I know that change is supposed to be good—it’s what I tell my kids, anyway—but ever since my next-door neighbours moved two weeks ago, I haven’t been able to get over the loss. I didn’t expect to be so emotional, nor did I realize I’d grown so attached, but this family is extraordinary. They … [Read more...]
Motherless Mothering On Mother’s Day
Say that title five times fast please. Mother’s Day is right around the corner. This is my 15th one without my mom being here and my 7th as being one. (Although since Will is already saying he’s 8 because it’s his 8th year on earth..maybe I should round up as well). The first few years after … [Read more...]
Today Is A Gift
Today I am 46. For months this number has bothered me. Closer to 50 than 40. Old. Middle-aged. How fortunate I would be if 46 is middle-aged. How lucky I am to be another day older. These are my thoughts this morning. Yesterday, a wonderful family that I know was robbed of their husband and … [Read more...]
Book Review: “Before I Go” By Colleen Oakley
The day my mom was diagnosed with cancer we cut her hair short and dyed it purple. The colour description on the box said “Rich Mahogany,” but we decided to add the colour booster because, really, why the heck not? Anyway, the result pushed mom’s hair into purple territory and she looked like a … [Read more...]
Book Review: “Everything I Never Told You” By Celeste Ng
I don’t know how you feel about your high school experience, but you couldn’t pay me enough to repeat mine. Don’t get me wrong: it wasn’t horribly traumatic or anything (and it’s been a long time since I’ve had one of those locker combination dreams), it just isn’t in my Top Five list of “Best Times … [Read more...]
Remembering You
Today marks the fifth anniversary of my mother's death. And while I suppose it's true that time eventually heals all wounds, my soul knows that there are some losses that take a piece of you with them, leaving behind a deep, deep fissure. Most days, you carry on and the crack is small; not … [Read more...]
The Journey to Death
How can I know about dying and how I want to live my journey if I don't open myself up fully to the experience? As I watched my sister-in-law this past summer and now my good friend go through the deaths of their mothers, as I hold their hands, share my wisdom and cry tears of loss and gut … [Read more...]
A Little Tenderness
My father died this week after a long battle with dementia. It is many things I am coming to understand; painful, surreal, a blessing, darkness, light, a terrible sadness, a relief. When I understood he was gone, I felt a feeling I had never felt before. I felt my shoulders go up and down. … [Read more...]
Kiss of Death?
What if you kissed someone... and they died? Who I Kissed, by Janet Gurtler Sourcebooks Fire, ISBN: 978 1 402 27054 3 Sam really, really liked Zee - so when her crush kissed someone else right after having a moment with her, she may have sort of kissed another guy just to show she didn't … [Read more...]
Love You Forever However We Can
I originally posted this during my mom's battle with cancer 4 years ago but I was taken back to this place watching my sister-in-law care for her mother, my mother-in-law. We lost her this past Sunday. This post is to all of the daughters and sons who become caregivers for their parents. I used to … [Read more...]
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