This year there was no celebrating for me at the dawn of 2009. I am not interested in what this year has to offer. I want time to stop. I want to stay right where I was over the last month. Safe with my family together. Happy. Healthy. But, as every Trekky knows, resistance is futile. So 2009 pulled … [Read more...]
Saying Good Bye
Today I say good bye. Good-bye 2008! It's been a year of ridiculous highs: (Three trips to Europe!) And unbelievable lows: (The black ribbon, symbolizing melanoma) And, through it all, the best Christmas in years: Moments of intense peace: Of joy and love: And tearful … [Read more...]
Hurry up and Wait
Today I went with my parents to Princess Margaret Hospital for my mother's first chemotherapy treatment. It was a lesson in so many things, not the least of which was patience. We arrived at 10:00 a.m. and waited in the chemo daycare lobby until my mom could be seen by the nurse in charge of the … [Read more...]
A Word of Thanks (and a Few of Advice)
Before I begin, let me fill you all in on some info that you may or may not have known: Jen and I are sisters, and so this hellish cancer is consuming my days and nights as well. There now. Let me begin. I want to thank everyone out there (in my 'real' life and online, too) who has reached out to … [Read more...]
I Got Nothin’
I have sat here staring at a blank screen for the last 30 minutes. I decided I wanted to write about something else today. Something other than my mom's cancer. But nothing came to me. Nada. It's not like nothing else has been going on in my life. I mean, come on. I have two busy kids and I run my … [Read more...]
And We Wait
We have come so far in the last 200 years when it comes to modern medicine. But what I have learned this week is that we still have a really long way to go. There is no cure for cancer. There is no totally effective treatment for melanoma. What works for some doesn't always work for others and the … [Read more...]
Lumpy
My Mom: Jen. Come here. Does my scar look lumpy? It has been feeling a bit lumpy. Me: Let me see. (Lifts shirt to see scar on shoulder) My Dad: How long has it felt lumpy?! Why didn't you say it was lumpy?! You need to tell someone if the scar feels lumpy! Jen, does it look lumpy?! Me: Oh my. Well. … [Read more...]
The Final Stretch or The First Step
This is the final week of the intensive Interferon treatment for my mom. It has been a wild ride and I know we will all be happy when it is over. But, this is by no means "it". She has 11 more months of Interferon self injected 3 times per week and we are waiting to hear whether she will … [Read more...]
The Latest
It's funny, right now my life is completely focused on one thing - my mom. I am honestly having trouble focusing or even caring that much about anything else. It is amazing how things that seemed so important a few weeks ago suddenly just don't. I think one person only has the emotional capacity to … [Read more...]
Suffering is Suffering
Wow, this is hard. I know my mom is sick because of the Interferon treatment but, as a wise mom at hockey said to me, "suffering is suffering". It's true. No matter the reason, when someone you love is in pain it hurts. My mom has been experiencing extreme side effects from her treatment … [Read more...]