Today was the day we celebrate all moms. I think today was my most favourite Mothers Day since I became a mom just over 10 years ago.
And it was. She loved the fact that she had her choice of 5 preset fake hip hop songs to choose from. On the birthday card. (note: her birthday is in March)
Sean secretly took all of the old videotapes of the boys and got them transferred onto disks (we updated the camera when I was pregnant with Eva). That was his gift to me.
I spent Mothers Day watching old videos of my boys as babies. Watching myself as a totally different mother. Watching through different eyes.
Watching myself as a mother of one. Seeing myself pregnant. Watching myself give birth…wondering as I watched it at what exact time did he sustain his brain injury…
Watching my boys meet each other for the first time. Watching myself breastfeeding. Hearing Cam’s tiny toddler voice, seeing his cherubic face before it was smattered with freckles.
Remembering back to when life was pretty simple. Watching myself, not knowing what was to come. The depression. The autism. The hemangioma.
It was really wonderful to watch. It wasn’t sad or bittersweet. It was great. I loved seeing that part of our life. When I wasn’t jaded by experiences.
I actually laughed at the videos of a 2 year Cuyler stimming just like the 8 year old Cuyler does.
So many fun memories.
And god was I skinny after 2 kids. That third kid just did me in.
I write about my life as a mother every day. I write about the good, the bad and the downright shitty. I appreciate my life as a mom and feel as though I get to celebrate that each time I reflect and write about it.
Maybe next year.