0 06/01/2013 parenting Infants & Toddlers

You know how mad we get when dads are like, “oh, I’m babysitting my kids today,” because what they are actually doing is parenting? I think I am one of those dads. Because I feel like if I was parenting, I would demonstrate at least some degree of competence.

Let’s just call this babysitting?
Spouse has been away on a fishing trip since Thursday night, and he will be back tomorrow evening. I wanted the toddler to like me, so yesterday I took him to Dairy Queen and we had ice cream for dinner. Things were off to a promising start.
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I think I let him get too comfortable, you guys.
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In the span of about two hours this morning, he managed to wreak irrevocable havoc on our small apartment. He was having the best time!
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Everything is everywhere. At one point I thought I’d do some laundry but didn’t bother finishing the job because oh god, what’s the point of anything?
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He’s in bed now, so I guess I could clean it all up. Or I could set my building on fire and just walk away, toddler slung over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes. At this point, I’m too tired to make myself a sandwich, so who knows what will become of us.
I might just institute a new fishing tax. The joy of going fishing for the weekend now comes with a requirement to clean up the apartment when you get back. Good luck with that, Spouse. Not only are all the things everywhere, but they are sticky to boot.

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