0 06/01/2013 parenting Infants & Toddlers

You know how mad we get when dads are like, “oh, I’m babysitting my kids today,” because what they are actually doing is parenting? I think I am one of those dads. Because I feel like if I was parenting, I would demonstrate at least some degree of competence.

Let’s just call this babysitting?
Spouse has been away on a fishing trip since Thursday night, and he will be back tomorrow evening. I wanted the toddler to like me, so yesterday I took him to Dairy Queen and we had ice cream for dinner. Things were off to a promising start.
I think I let him get too comfortable, you guys.
In the span of about two hours this morning, he managed to wreak irrevocable havoc on our small apartment. He was having the best time!
Everything is everywhere. At one point I thought I’d do some laundry but didn’t bother finishing the job because oh god, what’s the point of anything?
He’s in bed now, so I guess I could clean it all up. Or I could set my building on fire and just walk away, toddler slung over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes. At this point, I’m too tired to make myself a sandwich, so who knows what will become of us.
I might just institute a new fishing tax. The joy of going fishing for the weekend now comes with a requirement to clean up the apartment when you get back. Good luck with that, Spouse. Not only are all the things everywhere, but they are sticky to boot.

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