As usual my children are driving me nuts, and of course with the warm weather here it is even worse as they run back and forth through the back door. Out then in, out then in, and with this comes the dirt because after years of playing in the backyard there really isn’t any grass left. But I’ll be honest it isn’t just the in and out, it’s the eating, the not putting anything away, just the sheer chaos of eight children running the house.
So last night I decided that it was time for a list of house rules for everyone – even Thatcher and Tanner – yes it was time that these monkeys of mine realized who is in charge of this zoo!
Food goes in the mouth, not on the floor.
Food is to be eaten not thrown at siblings. This includes Thatcher and Tanner.
Food is to be eaten out of a dish, WITH utensils. Crouching under the table licking food from a bowl is usually left for the animals. We have no animals.
Never bite anything that can bite back. This includes the twins, all siblings, and mommy when she is on her computer.
Nobody is fooling me. I am fully aware that when you suddenly decide to give me a hug you are either wiping your snotty nose on my shirt, wiping your sticky dirty hands on my pants or shirt – or if your name is Ryley – both.
Toilet paper is for wiping body parts with in the bathroom – it wasn’t made for little boys to attach to their naked butts so they can run around screaming “look at my tail!” or “I farted out a tail!” (What is it with boys and farts anyway?)
911 is for emergencies only – lack of chicken noodle soup, and mommy being in what you consider to be a bad mood isn’t really an emergency.
We do not write on the walls – that is what paper is for.
Thatcher and Tanner – gentle means gentle – not whacking each other’s heads!
Diapers are for babies not for playing with ………………. really? do I need to explain this?
The top bunk bed is not a trampoline that is to be used to jump off so you can fly across the bedroom.
urniture is for sitting on, not for attempting flips on.
Yes you must have a bath or shower.
Do not even bother coming to me and asking if I want to know what so and so is doing – I don’t.
Garbage goes in the garbage can. Remember that – GARBAGE CAN.
Thatcher and Tanner do you really have to be so darn cute?
When we go out in public please try to act like you are a children not an animals – just once please….