So, there have been rumors floating around the web that Ali Fedotowsky ended up single after finishing her run for love on this season of The Bachelorette. And I kind of believe them too…mostly on account of the networks NOT showing any sort of final rose ceremony footage in their promos, as they are usually apt to do. I had thought that maybe that meant that there was no final rose ceremony as Ali picks neither of the two finalists.
But I should have gone with my gut. My gut, which usually is all “feed me cookies!’ was pretty dead-on this season. I mean, look who was in my top 4 after the first episode…Oh! What’s that? The final three? And, oh, wait, what’s that I said after episode 2? YES. That’s right. The final two. I guess the producers used Rated-R AND Frank to draw attention away from the fact that we already knew who the final 2 were going to be. Ali even said so herself: “We always had a really strong connection from the very first night. I just had a feeling, a really strong feeling ..”
Ali did throw them a bone, though, with her choice to send Chris L. (obviously the next Bachelor. OBVIOUSLY. You heard it here first) home before allowing him to get down on one knee and propose to her…just to have to hear her say that she’s in love with someone else. I gotta say, Ali, on a show where classy doesn’t happen much, that was a VERY classy move. And, then, after Chris got dumped, he saw a rainbow…OF COURSE HE DID. His mother told him to look for her in rainbows and then, there it was, a goddamn rainbow and then I simultaneously a giant weepy ball of mush and laughing for the hilarity of the Chris L is too perfect situation. I mean…REALLY? I guess not perfect enough…because Miss Ali prefers her men playing baseball and not seeing rainbows, I guess.
And guys who say things like…”You told me how important it was for your husband to love you unconditionally and for him to by your side, no matter what. I want to be that man for you. I want to make you laugh, just like this. I want to make you smile. I want to make sure you wake up every night, every morning for the rest of your life knowing that you’re so so loved … I want to grow old with you, I want to have a beautiful, beautiful family with you. I want to share my life with you. Share your life with me, be my wife, Ali Fedotowsky.”
I wish them better luck than Jake and Vienna.