I want to take a minute to send you over here, to my first Bachelor post of the season.
Go on, get.
You see what I did there, right? I pointed you over to the place where I made my final four prediction after watching only one episode of this show. And notice that I chose exactly THREE of the four correctly. This leads me to believe the one of the following things is true…a) I watch WAY too much of this show or b) Brad has his ladies picked from day one.
It’s possible that both of these things are true. Probably, actually. Definitely with my choices for the top 2 – Chantal O. and Emily, because, obviously, he is so into the both of them.
But, truth be told, the three who didn’t get sent home on this week’s episode – incidentally, the three who didn’t take Brad to the place where she EMBALMS BODIES
and talks to him about death which makes him ridiculously uncomfortable – were pretty awesome dates. All three of them.
The previews made it look like little Ricki was going to hate on Mr. Brad…but that was some good editing there because she warmed up to her new friend and they got along famously.
The only awkward moment of the night was when Emily was all up for getting it on with Mr. Brad, but he got all “dude, there’s a kid sleeping upstairs” uncomfortable. But Emily took matters into her own hands and fixed that situation.
Ashley’s family was all kinds of awesome and I especially enjoyed her dad in his lumberjack shirt in their super northern Maine town where there are more moose than people. One thing that had me super confused was her mangling of the word poutine. You know, as a CANADIAN, I am, like, 800% certain it’s pronounced poo-teen, not putz-zen.
Chantal and Brad were ridiculously adorable when they sat on her couch surrounded by pets talking about the future and buying houses that would include all of her pets. But once we went to Daddy’s (who…spoiler alert: played for the Seattle Seahawks once upon a time in the 70s) house, I had a hard time noticing anything other than how ridiculously mansion-esque that house was…and how plastic surgery-ed her mom’s face looked. I hope Chantal ages gracefully and doesn’t pin back her eyes that way.