AHOY! there are spoilers ahead. I am just warning you that I am about to talk about season 5 of Dexter. If you, like some people I know, have never watched Dexter, well, then, I have a fantastic Christmas present for you. Go on, get it. Now, for the rest of you, OMG, we need to talk about this season and the finale and LUMEN.
I think there were likely two Lumen camps…the ones who loved her and the ones who wish that she’d never forced Dexter down a season-long voyage of offing all of her rapists, one-by-one. I loved her. All I could see was a lovely little season 6, filled with a Dexter and Lumen Bonnie-and-Clyde-esque-Dark-Passenger-keeping-Miami-safe killing team. Come on, it would have been awesome. But, of course, as Dexter’s dad keeps coming back to remind him, Dexter will never change, and Dexter probably will never be happy. It’s a shame, really, because Lumen was about as close as Dexter could possibly get. I mean, she accepted his dark passenger; she embraced it even. And she joined in the killing game. But, then she left. Jordan Chase is dead and so is her own dark passenger. Left on a midnight train to Georgia. Or wherever she came from. Ohio? Minnesota?
The real winner of this season might be, dare-I-say-it Deb. She was right, after all. It was confirmed that the people hunting Jordan Chase were, in fact, a vigilante couple in love. Number 13 and the man who loves her. She just had no idea that it was her brother and Lumen. And they were spared because of her. And she realizes that Quinn might be a giant asshole at times, and has a seriously bad fake tan, but she loves him…and she’s willing to accept his many faults. I am on the Deb love train right now.
But, wait, DOES she know that it’s Dexter? When she told him at the party that he should be RELIEVED. That was a weird choice of words, right?
Okay. So, yes, Dexter didn’t get caught and that’s all well and good. But there are some major problems with this season finale. How on earth did Quinn get off so easily…just because the blood on his shoe proved (thanks to his new bff, Dexter) to not be his. I mean, there were still the phone calls from Liddy…and the SURVEILLANCE EQUIPMENT that QUINN signed out from Miami Metro. And his fingerprints are on the van. Quinn should not be partying with Harrison, he should still be being questioned.
ALSO. Deb let the killers go. And Deb didn’t call in the Jordan Chase murder. So, when everyone at Harrison’s party claps and says, “all hail the girl who solved the barrel girls case!” what exactly did she solve? Jordan Chase is missing. The killers are missing. All she did was find the camp where they did the raping and killing. That solves what…exactly?
I cannot wait for season 6. Also, more Masuka please.