For over a week now, my throat has been constricted and achy, my mouth has been sticky, and my body has swung between too hot and too cold. For four nights I didn’t sleep. If in general I am “THAT mom” then when I am sick, I am … a disgrace.
On Friday, my toddler only ate Cheerios.
Well, he ate, like, half a Family Size box of them. But still.
While I loathe the idea of gender roles and traditional family dynamics, there are some things that noticeably slip when I am incapacitated. The food suffers – Spouse could feed himself if he had to, but feeding the kidlet as well means take-out is the easiest option. Spouse does not have the emotional fortitude to lovingly prepare a home-cooked meal – which is really just a labour-intensive way of preparing to do battle – and then wrestle bites into his son’s mouth while the kid throws as much of it as he can onto the floor while wailing about the inhumanity of it all. I do dinners and battles better.
Toddler routine suffers as well. There is no order to his time when I am not bossing everyone around, and he goes to bed when I am tired which is earlier than usual. Which means he wakes up earlier which means he plays alone in his crib for a little longer which means no one knows what time nap time should be and MOM IS SICK SHUT UP EVERYBODY WHAT ARE YOU ANIMALS?
It’s been a long week. I’ve meant to introduce myself, but it’s hard to type from a horizontal position. The cat has been creeping around as if she knows I am about to die, and for a few days there I started to get worried – the current state of cleanliness around here suggests that I could be dead a few days before anyone noticed and she’d probably be able to eat a good-sized chunk out of my face in that time and I was hoping to be taxidermied.
Hi, my name is Emily. My parenting philosophy has always been about keeping the bar low – this week has been one of my most exemplary. So it is at this low point that I’ve decided to start sharing my stories of detachment parenting on the west coast. If this has been a grim introduction, I promise, it will get better. I have six more days of antibiotics.
Chantel says
Love hearing other moms confess to letting their kiddies eat a box of cheerios for dinner – as for me it is ice cream from breakfast (it’s dairy!) Anyhow, hope you are feeling better soon, and can’t wait to hear about life on the west coast!
C
Nancy says
cousin! I can’t believe it! Yes life is cool when it intersects like this xoxoxo
Kath says
Well, you’re in good company here (re: low parenting bar and all)! Hope you feel better soon.
Sonya says
Awesome Emily! Love this post! Boo that you’re sick π
Looking forward to your posts!!!
Julie says
you could probably trip on my bar on the way in to my house π being sick is the worst when you have really little ones! get better soon!
Sara says
Greetings from another ‘low bar’ mom!!! Hope you’re feeling better! Looking forward to sharing the crazy!
Tracey says
You hang in there, lady – I look forward to reading all about your life on the West coast! Get better soon!!
Emily says
Thank you all for such a warm welcome! I’m feeling better already just reading all your kind words π I’m looking forward to being part of this community!
Leslie says
Welcome Emily, sorry to hear you have been under the weather but glad to have you on board!!
Angie says
I hope you are feeling better Emily! When my kids were younger, I was overcome with quite a virulent stomach virus while my husband was on a business trip one time. My 6 yr. old fed herself and my 1 yr. old toast for supper and then she got a chair and threw him in the crib for bedtime! lol! Kids cope better than we think sometimes! Hope your week gets better! Angie xo
Sandra says
Ohh boy, I hear ya on the house falling apart when mom’s sick thing. I’ve just been knocked out with a cold and hubby becomes equally useless when I can’t bark out orders at him. So every single dish and glass we own lies unwashed on the kitchen bench, in the sink, on the stove. Takeout containers overflowing the garbage. Baby seems more active than usual, too. It’s a mad house in here. Can’t I just be sick in peace?
Cat H says
Nancy, I can vouch for the fact that Emily is hilarious…and also it’s kind of weird when two very separate parts of life run into each other! π
brenna b says
Hi Emily! Fun being sick isn’t it?! Lol. Your hubby sounds all too much like mine!! Good read π
Nancy says
Emily! Welcome to urbanmoms. You are hilarious. Feel better so you can write us often!
Nancy
http://www.urbanmoms.ca/flying_solo/
Amanda says
Welcome, Emily! I too am a “low bar” mom and it’s great to have you here. π Hope you get well soon!
Emily says
Hi Jason – thanks! And yes you can. I’m reading you too!
Jason says
Welcome Em…can I call you Em? Looking forward to reading about all your (mis) adventures!
Cheers.
J.
http://www.urbanmoms.ca/breakfast_for_dinner/
Jen says
WELCOME Emily! I am so excited to have you onboard and look forward to following along as you reach new lows (um…). Anyway, welcome to UrbanMoms and I hope you feel better soon π