My kids like to watch movies from when they were little
So last week the 3 of us watched some really old ones.
It was fun and shocking and tender and embarrassing.
It was weird to see us as again as a family of four. It was tender to see some married moments that were good. It was embarrassing to see how rigid I was as a parent – and thankfully I have loosened up (quite) a bit.
One particular scene had us celebrating youngest daughter’s 1st b day. Her older sister had not finished her dinner and I wouldn’t let her have birthday cake.
She was having a full on tantrum
You could see the whole extended family quietly trying to shake me of my rigid doctrine of no dinner =no dessert. I stayed eerily calm and did not engage.
I know I felt parenting then was a pay now or pay (dearly) later scenario. I felt if I caved easily my kids would take over and anarchy would ensue.
I felt it was a slippery slope from refusing to eat your broccoli to glue sniffing and stealing hubcaps.
So as all my family cringed and I was steadfast and it likely somewhat derailed the party, my kids have always known what I expect from them, who they could look to for guidance and love. Even if I was a bit of a dictator.
This movie made me think. I am glad I have grown up with them and changed with them. I am glad they have taught me so much, and I am thankful that we made it to this point the way we have.
What about you, are you getting more rigid or loosening up as your children grow?