LJ is digging our mild October weather and I must say thank God for this weather because if it were grey and dreary I think I would be ready to just crawl under the covers. No matter what anyone out there tells you being a new mom the second time around is just as difficult and exhausting as it was the first time. It’s become a bit of a cycle. I have a couple of good weeks where my energy is high and all the stars seem to align, but inevitably I fall. It’s been another one of THOSE weeks.
This week I’m just tired. I’ve been up a lot in the night with both kids, LJ seems to be going through a growth spurt as his appetite is insatiable, the piles of laundry seem to be growing exponentially, the house is cluttered with toys and clothes and crap – I feel like I can never get ahead. There is never a moment where I can sit down with a cup of tea and think ahhh.
I’m also feeling guilty because I’ve been too exhausted at the end of the day to play with L’il E. He wants my attention, but I find I’ve been impatient with him and don’t have the energy to let him explore and wander as we walk home from “school”. When we finally get home I just want him to sit and play on his own so I can rush to get dinner ready so we can get in to the nightly routine of bath, books and bed. Honestly, I feel like I’m on a treadmill!
So, needless to say when the Hubs got home from work last night I just crumbled into his arms – my strength had completely vanished from my tired body. Yes, I bite off more than I can chew at times (running my own business), but this fatigue is purely new mom exhaustion. Fortunately, the Hubs has a knack for always seeing the positive side of everything and told me to look at the big picture. These first few months seem incredibly long, but in the long term they are so short. LJ is already three months old and he’s such a jolly little guy.
It’s true, when you’re in the midst of the exhaustion it’s easy to blow things out of perspective. So I’m just doing the best that I can right now and expect that in a few weeks from now things will get a little easier.
Here’s to another beautiful sunny day. I’ll just put my sunnies on and march on.