Goal Setting in the traditional sense is an activity where one specifies desired outcomes , time-lines and targets to help them get there. Now while all these things are important in making change ,once you become a mom your view of the world often changes. When your view of the world changes you may not realize that some of goals conflict with your vision. With all the upheaval in the world some women experience anxiety for the world their children are inheriting. Successful goal setting for moms must have a purpose that is compatible with the change they want to see in the world. It is with this purpose every step towards achieving goals actually creates not just change in oneself but change in the world around them. I believe most people want to make a difference and when you become a mom that inner desire is amplified. In the words of Deepak Chopra “consciousness is coming” and I happen to believe that mothers will have great hand in elevating the consciousness of the world. In my own observation I have seen the most corporate woman make small to very drastic conscious changes inspired by motherhood. I have seen very aware women turn that awareness into powerful action, again inspired by motherhood. I have also seen the opposite fear based reactions, especially in myself. These reactions were driven out of fear and a desire to ignore the things that scare me . When we buy into the idea that we don’t have the power to make change in the world we can justify striving after only self-serving goals. This mentality as a mom is not sustainable. In fact the more conscious one becomes it will be less sustainable to approach life in a self serving way. Creating goals with consciousness is an amazing experience that keeps moms committed to themselves and their desire to see a more maternal world . This can apply to goal setting around family, fitness, career, financial security ,relationship and anything that you want to include.
Motherhood is a very vulnerable and growth defining moment in a womens life . Many of us will see the best and worst of ourselves in this highly charged experience of life.Goal setting that aligns your purpose as a women, mother, in the areas of relationship, career, parenting and personal health is essential.
The first thing I suggest is writing your personal vision/mission statement to clearly define how you view your role in the world. Then write or re-write your goals to make sure they align with your vision/mission statement.
An example of a vision/ mission statement.
I want a world for my children and I where abundance is the right of everyone and fear doesn’t drive my decision making. In this world my life would be filled with appreciation for the now and includes everyone I come into contact with. I see gratitude and forgiveness as the foundation from which love is expressed.
Your goals are yours and serve a purpose in your life. The key to knowing if they are aligned with your vision for your world is if you feel at peace in your pursuit of them. If not ,it may be time to re-evaluate. Moms often go through this when deciding when and if to go back to work. Career goals conflict with mothering goals quite frequently. The key is to find the right mix to achieve a life that feels balance.
Recommended Resources
Books I have read are:
The Power of Now by Eckort Tolle
The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer
Wishing everyone a peaceful today and time to reflect!
Andrea
I try not to think of resolutions, it sounds like a big effort to make and I’m sooo lazy. So what I do is start things little by little, focusing on each day, instead of thinking in a big resolution. And having small goals that sum up to a big one.
I am not a ‘NY resolution’ kind of person but I do believe that setting goals is very important. It gives you a purpose…goals are definitely good 🙂
I have also read both the books you mentioned, but it has been a while, and I’m thinking my goal for January/February needs to be to revisit them! My tip for readers new to these books is to be patient with yourself when ingesting them… Read more slowly than is your usual, and allow for some confusion and re-reading of passages. It will help all the good stuff sink in.
Hi Emily
A mission statment is not meant to be a goal at all. Not even really the person you wish to be. If so that would be exhuasting i agree. It is a statement that expresses your values and intentions for a reference when setting goal concrete or otherwise. This is actually meant to prevent emotionally exhausting conflicting goals. Hope that clarifys my message!
Cheers
Andrea
I have read both books you commented on and enjoyed them both. Can you suggest another book along the sam lines…thanks!
I have started reading Eckhart Tolle’s “A New Earth” and it has really helped me put into perspective what goal setting means in my life.
It looks quite different from what it would have looked like in my life BC (Before Children).
I try to look at the shift in my life as the opening up of my self to experience things as neutral and of the moment. I really helps me not get stressed out as much as I used to and the adult tantrums and drama have greatly diminished in my life.
Be well.
Idas
Setting goals is great but as long as you use them as a guide line to where you would like your future to be and not set yourself up for disappointment if you do attain these!
I like the idea but I find that just thinking about setting a lofty life goal is exhausting. I have always just tried to be the person I wish I was – a good way of becoming that person. Being aware of my own moral compass enables me to make decisions that are right for me, and hopefully for my child and the people around me. I’m not convinced that writing down a grand vision/mission statement would work for me, but if it works for you, I wish you all the best!
I have found that the key to setting goals is to break them down into the smallest pieces — nothing general, like clean the house, or lose weight — I need to have many little tasks, and love crossing things off as they are done. So, instead of writing I will clean the house today, I would write , clean kitchen counters, wash floors, polish windows, etc… What a great feeling of accomplishment as I mark each item done!