One summer my friends took their children, 8 and 10, to Italy for three weeks. They spared no expense, having both an authentic and ridiculously good time. Sophisticated in a simple way but not stuffy.When the children returned to school after labour day, each were, in their separate grades, asked what their favourite summer memory was. The eight year old wrote a fantastic one page run on sentence, sparing no emotion or adjective, about a slushy her dad bought her at the corner store down the street from home. The ten year old went a little farther from home saying her favourite summer memory was when her “best friend Helena ate a deep fried pickle at the Ex”.
Italy had fallen off the map of their memory bank.
I laughed hard about this but took the lesson and shoved it into the back pocket of my mind. Now when I plan anything or feel guilty about some of the opportunities I am not giving my children, I remember the slushy theory.
If you ask any adult what they remember from their childhood it is never a grand moment or any fabulous stuff, it is usually a beautiful ritual or a sharing of something small. March Break is one of three times a year that we refer to as ‘sure, why not season’. As speed is reduced and agendas fall away, it is easy to answer any request from my children with a “sure why not”. How about a slushy? Sure, why not. A deep fried pickle? Not for me thanks but you go crazy.
You are so right, Nancy. Sometimes we need to step back and look at what really matters. Feeling guilty is a waste of energy! When I took my son to London and Paris his favourite memory was hanging with his baby cousin in London and a friend’s bday party in Paris (although the best part of the party was the fine french cheeses and the sip of real Champagne!). My favourite part was hanging with my son for 10 days.