Ok…not really a great debate. Just wondering what others thoughts are on this topic.
Cam plays on an atom rep hockey team – they are 10 (turning 11).
There are 2 girls on his team.
Know where this is going yet?
A parent went to our team liaison concerned that the girls should have their own place to change. When Sean told me, it was the first thought I’d given to the issue and my immediate reply was “Oh ya. I guess they should.” I told him I actually thought it was the perfect time to start separating them.
Now I should include that this was never an issue of discontent on the team, but there was actually a bit of a divide. Sean told me that some parents said they should. Some parents said they didn’t think it was necessary. It’s not an issue for the kids. The girls don’t care. The boys don’t care.
My argument was that, since I’ve worked in a grade 5 class I know firsthand that some girls start developing physically around 10 – 11 yrs old.
The argument back was that the boys don’t care. They don’t notice. They don’t look. It’s not an issue. The girls have been playing hockey with these boys for years.
To that I replied I’m sure it’s not an issue now but once they start learning about puberty in school this year, they may become curious and they could possibly start seeing each other differently. And start looking.
As far as them being in a room with the boys, we figure seeing them in their boxer briefs is no worse than seeing them in their bathing suits. The main concern was the girls changing their tops. Is that a double standard?
To that I replied I’m sure it’s not an issue now but once they start learning about puberty in school this year, they may become curious and they could possibly start seeing each other differently. And start looking.
As far as them being in a room with the boys, we figure seeing them in their boxer briefs is no worse than seeing them in their bathing suits. The main concern was the girls changing their tops. Is that a double standard?
In any case, the specific issue has been resolved. One of the girls has always arrived at the arena already dressed. The other girl has started doing the same. She decided she’d rather come dressed than go to her own change room.
I am glad that the parent brought their concern forward as I think it was important topic to address.
My take on the issue is that once the question is asked – it’s probably time.
Maybe next year we start the season out with separate rooms.
Have you had to address gender issues in sporting activities?
What age do you think co-ed teams should start dressing separately?
The suggestion of underarmour solving the problem is a great one. No kid should have to travel to and from games in full equipment. The time spent in the dressing room is sometimes the best part of the experience, don’t let your daughter miss out on that. The other fact to consider is that for most girls, not all, the time will come when playing girls hockey is the answer. Girls hockey ranges from houseleague to very competitive and there is a spot for every level of player. The bonding that goes on for girls in a dressing room full of other girls, can not compare to that of a boys change room. Don’t get me wrong, I have a daughter who plays girls hockey and I have a son who plays rep hockey with 4 girls on his team. I have seen both sides and it can work.
Yes Erin – that’s what one of the girls did. She always had her under armour on, keeping covered. The other girl has since started coming dressed.
It’s time. For sure. I taught grade 5 for six years and I’ve seen it all- a lot of Grade 5 boys could care less, but there are always a few that start noticing the differences between boys and girls and want to point it out- better to make the change now.
Wouldn’t undershirts take care of the problem? I don’t play or have kids who play but a cami would cover up.
Another year though, no way.
When there were girls on my son’s atom team, boys were asked to wear boxers, and the girls changed what they needed to in the washroom cubicle within the change room. No one noticed or cared. At Bantam, the girls had their own room, but were asked to join the team as soon as they were ready and at least 15 minutes before ice time to join the ‘antics’ and be part of the team. No one was showering, so no issue there. The priority is making the kids comfortable, and make a no cell phone rule in the change rooms.
Yes – you are so right about things happening overnight. I’m just glad it was brought up and resolved before it became an uncomfortable or awkward issue for anyone.
That’s what’s happening now. The girls are coming dressed. They don’t want to miss out on the change room dynamics/antics/pregame team stuff.
It was never their (the girls) issue – rather a parent brought it up and we didn’t want it to become their issue.
They really don’t want be treated any differently than the boys. This seems to be working. win win!
Almost all of these boys have been playing hockey with girls since Jr Tyke (age 5). I think we were all just coasting along not thinking about it. Having girls on the team was just normal as playing hockey with a stick.
Some of the kids DO have cell phones – so very good point Sara.
I don’t have boys but know that they are behind girls in physical development earlier- parents of boys might not see the issue- but there are always a handful of girls at this age who are developping. It seems to happen overnight! Sounds like problem solved. I love that there are girls on the team and I would do anything to keep them there! Giving a separate place to change is not going to spoil them!!!!
I think if anyone, including a parent, thinks it is time then it is. My daughter has asked for her own dressing room since she was 7. She just wasn’t comfortable dressing in front of the boys so she either had her own space – which can be isolating – or arrived dressed. No one should feel uncomfortable.
I don’t even have to think about this one – to me, it’s not appropriate. These aren’t 5 year olds – these are pre-teens. You know me – I couldn’t be more liberal but kids at that age are developing so differently – physically and mentally. What if – just if – and this is worst case scenario – one of the boys IS looking and has a phone – and takes a picture….do you know what I mean? I just think it’s asking for trouble. I’d say – maybe 6 or 7….what age is it at swimming pools? I can’t remember.