Must. Have. Smartfood Popcorn. NOW!!!!!!!!
No, seriously, I MUST HAVE IT. Hold on a sec, ‘kay. Going to go call Josh — he’ll be coming home from swimming with the monkey now. Better catch him on his way home….
‘kay back. He’s going to get me some. He better not dilly-dally, though. I need it NOW!
Actually, that’s one thing with this pregnancy I’ve noticed lately — now that I think of it. I need everything NOW! I need Josh to wake up NOW! I need that popcorn NOW! I need to pee NOW! I need to sleep NOW! I need to tackle a kitty NOW! I need new maternity clothes NOW! The monkey needs a big-girl bed NOW! So-and-so needs to shut up NOW!…So, I end up getting mad all the time (usually at Josh) because, unfortunately, one can’t get EVERYTHING one wants NOW!
I’m LOVING "RLG" lately. Remember her from last week’s post? "Random Lady at Gym"? Well, she gave me more material for this week’s post. I only go to the gym once a week for my beloved NIA class, and she’s always coming in as I’m leaving. So, here’s the convo from THIS WEEK’s encounter:
RLG: Oh my G-D!
Me: Oh, hi!
RLG: I just saw, you, what? Last week? And, you were HUGE last week, and now you’re DOUBLE the size!
Me: Oh, I, um, yes, I, erm —
RLG: It’s just DISGUSTING! It’s DISGUSTING!
Me: Yeah, I just keep getting bigger, don’t I?
RLG: I mean, I recognized your daughter and then looked up at you and, just… DISGUSTING!
Me: Thanks?
RLG: And, I saw you stretching at the end of your class, and your head was down to the floor — I couldn’t believe it.
Me: Yeah, it was kindof uncomfortable…but, gotta stretch.
RLG: You’re just huge…. That’s, just, DISGUSTING. That’s DISGUSTING!
HEE!!!! I LOVE HER! I mean, I could be totally appalled by this random conversation. Everyone I repeat it to is appalled. But, I think it’s hilarious. I’m at the point, I guess, where I’m laughing at all the comments.
Argh. Hold on a sec. MUST. PEE. NOW!!!!
One of the biggest problems with being this YUMUNGOUS is that people think they can tell you, i.e., that "You’re going to POP any minute now!" or "There’s no WAY you’re going to make it to your due date!" or "You’re so big, you’re for sure going to have a c-section!", etc., etc.. People said stuff like that to me all the time during my first pregnancy, and they’re saying it again now, AND THEY HAVE TO STOP IT BECAUSE IT SCARES ME. I mean, who wants to hear "you’re going to go any day now" when you’re ONLY 29 weeks pregnant? I mean, HELLOOO??!! It’s one thing to laugh with me and tell me I’m YUGE and "disgusting" (mind you, RLG was not laughing when she said "that’s disgusting"…), but it’s another to even JOKE about premature labour. SO. NOT. FUNNY. So just wrong.
In my last pregnancy, I was huge, too, and I gave birth only 4 days before my due date. And, TO THINK!?, I didn’t have a C-section! Isn’t that just incredible!? Hmph.
Oh oh oh! Josh is here with my Smartfood. But, erm. NOW, I don’t want it. Oh, heck, I’ll eat it anyway.
Here’s me at 29 weeks (after eating the whole bag of Smartfood…):
Okay, so, these are TERRIBLE pictures of me. First of all, I’m short, but I’m not THAT short — my oven and countertops are ridiculously high…. And, I’ve given up taking good pictures of my face. It just takes too long. But, for the record, I don’t look much like this — just ask Ali, she’ll tell you.
Want to read my personal blog? Check it — at The Cheaty Monkey?
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LOVE!
xo Haley-O
P.S. I love hearing from you in the comments!!! It rocks my world, really!
Okay…Now not only do we have matching night guaards and Mac boos and an affinity for Chunky Monkey but we can add Smartfood to our common passions. Messy to eat though…can’t help licking all the cheese off my fingers!
You have a GREAT attitude. Maybe you should (just for kicks) burst into tears on RGL. I wonder how she would handle a “disgusting” lady melting down all over her? Horrible woman!
Just think, in a year you’ll be tiny, hot AND have two beautiful kids and she’ll still be an idiot lol.
Shay
haley you always make me laugh.and i’m glad that you can laugh at the stupid woman calling you disgusting.you are beautiful.and in september you will have a beautiful baby.now i want popcorn.sereiously addicted to it. i am so excited for you.so you need to tell us more about the gym lady.im shocked that some other woman would tell a pregnant woman that her weight is disgusting.that being preggy is disgusting.she needs to explain herself to your readers. and friends.
Hilarious! In all seriousness however, that popcorn is to die for. 🙂
Jen
Hilarious! In all seriousness however, that popcorn is to die for. 🙂
Jen
That is so funny… what is she thinking… who says “disgusting” multiple times to a pregnant woman??? Too funny. She must have never been pregnant.
When I was 6 months, I was in NYC visiting a friend who has no children. My friend was amazed/horrified at how many people felt free to comment on how “huge” I was and that was only at 6 months… it must have been the clothes!
I’m glad your laughing!
Maybe she thought it was “disgusting” that a biggers pregnant woman can still stretch with her head to the floor?
Dunno. She is still an idiot.
i can attest to the now.
“josh! i need another slice of pizza NOW!” was hilarious.
i’m pretty sure i was the same when i was pregnant.
I remember when I was preggers and doing anything in the kitchen, my belly would always see the mess. Washing dishes=water on belly, stirring pot= food splattered on belly…the belly just gets in the way, doesn’t it? But it looks so darn good!!!!! I wish I could come touch it (even though I totally wouldn’t unless you offered)–so round, so gorj!!!!
Disgusting? Disgusting? My mouth is agape. Disgusting is sweaty, hairy men in speedos. Disgusting is chewing a taco with your mouth open and that gross slurpy/sucky sound. You, my dear, are not even close to disgusting. Perhaps digusting is the new phat?
Hi, Haley … You are certainly A Fitting Image … and how you feel, and what you do during your preganancy (especially in the last month or so) is nobody’s business but yours!! Big really IS beautiful. Don’t forget to make a photo album of all the photos you’ve taken during your pregnancy. It will be something very special to share with your little one … when not so little anymore. All the very best, Thea
I got those comments with every one of my pregnancies. And the earliest any of them came was the last one was a week early. And she was my smallest baby (though I was just as huge as with the others). The first was 3 days early, and the other two were 1 day late and 3 days late.
It is unbelievable the things people say. I like to point them out to them sometime in the future. For example, once one of my sister-in-laws said she couldn’t stand red hair on a boy. Being a redhead, the chances of my having a child with red hair (considering my husband has a teeny bit o’ the Irish floating around in that Italian), are pretty decent. This last pregnancy, I was actually hoping for a boy, not because I was dying to have a boy, or I didn’t want a girl. Nope, only because I hoped he would have red hair so that I could remind my sister-in-law of what she said. Didn’t work out, though. Got another beautiful girl, you can see her on my post today. So alas, I didn’t get to be a smart-ass. All my girls do have the most beautiful red highlights, though. 🙂
you look so darn good pregnant. I would never have the balls to lift my shirt like you do and look all happy doing it…LOL.
Way to go Haley, you are my new hero!!!!!!!!!
The RLG comments are cracking me up – only cause you think they are funny … if you didn’t I’d be annoyed for you.
But, good that you’re taking them with a grain of salt!
I got told all the time that I was going to have my son early. it’s like people think it’s fun to say or something.
I used to get e-mails every week that would tell me the size of the baby and potential problems that would occur if he was born at that genstation. It always made me feel better about the what-ifs. And, not that I think you’re going to go early, but my friend’s daughter had her baby 6 weeks early and she’s small but really healthy.
Anyway, hang in there.
Eagerly awaiting what you say to RLG, I think the orgasm comment should stop her in her tracks.
RENE — Thanks so much for the great support! I’m slowing down! SLOWING DOWN! 🙂
JEN — Thanks…. No new clothes, though. I was too tired. Had to lie down…NOW!!!
SUSAN — I’ve GOT to get a picture of RLG’s face! That line is CLASSIC!!!!!!!!!!!!
DREA, DAHLING! — YES, the due date is right — AND, I’M NOT NOT NOT GOING EARLY!
But, I still love you! 🙂
I feel so sad for you that people keep commenting on your size. I think that being pregnant looks so much bigger on us small gals. But for people to comment on it is wrong.
You look great, you’re growing a beautiful baby in there and you’re doing a great job.
Now SLOW DOWN and keep healthy. Love ya
I cant stand people saying stuff like that. Its rude.
You look beautiful.
How big was monkey?
Both my boys were on the normal side. Taite was small. 6 lbz 8 oz. I only gained 24 lbs .. Caleb was 7lbs 11oz… and I gained 25 with him.
Im very small framed tho.. so I dont think id be able to handle a baby much bigger than Caleb. He nearly split me.
Are you sure though that your due date is right? I had a friend who was like you, and looked ready to go at 6 months, turned out the due date was wrong, her baby was totally fine born reallllyyyy early.
Whats the ultrasounds say when they measure the baby? 🙂 Im so excited for you!!!
http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a170/DreaWd/blog/DSCF5841-1.jpg
Hey Hales. I saw you for real and you are big but we keep forgetting that you only have 2 months left! And, you are one of the teeny-tiny people…baby only has one way to go. I, on the other hand, never looked huge because I am nearly a foot taller than you.
You look absolutely GORJ!! Any new clothes??
Hey Hales. I saw you for real and you are big but we keep forgetting that you only have 2 months left! And, you are one of the teeny-tiny people…baby only has one way to go. I, on the other hand, never looked huge because I am nearly a foot taller than you.
You look absolutely GORJ!! Any new clothes??
You look so genuinely great & happy – happy is just bursting from your smile!
Next week, come prepared for RLG. Ready?
“You’re even bigger this week!”
“Yeah, that’s what happens when you have great sex.” (pat belly) “I gain an inch for every orgasm.”
Own it, girlfriend. It’s YOUR body, YOUR baby. Since you can’t change it, may as well have some fun with it.
Just… be sure to get a picture of RLG’s face when you spring that line on her!