I’m often amazed at how, as parents, we sometimes feel as though we have lost control of our children. I am confused when parents say they don’t have any control over their household when it comes to choices about food and exercise. Children are confined by the choices that parents make at the grocery store. Here is one comment that I often hear at my gym: “Oh, I could never take pop/ice cream/potato chips, etc. out of the house…my husband would kill me – he could never live without his (insert junk food here)” or “I just can’t get her to stop eating junk food at home! She won’t just have a bowl of ice cream – she’ll eat the WHOLE container in front of the TV.”
Since when did we as parents start feeling so guilty about saying “No”? In fact, this particular parent’s daughter is grossly overweight. Why do they have junk food in their home at all if they are trying to help their daughter? I often ask parents to ask themselves these questions: WHEN DID WE LOSE CONTROL? WHEN DID WE STOP FEELING THE RIGHT TO PARENT? Are we afraid of losing our child’s love or are we just stuck in a cycle of bad habits? Whatever the reason, we have the power to stop. And in order to help our children, it has to stop. We have to learn to take back control in order to give them a chance.
Every household should have rules, and food and exercise should be among them. Examples could include having your child ask permission for a snack, and after 8pm no more snacking. Kids should be strongly encouraged to be physically active which means at least 30 to 60 minutes of exercise a day. If they mow the lawn or walk the dog, that is 30 minutes! It adds up…it’s not hard. Junk food should be limited in the house. Parents must learn to take back control and to model healthy behaviour.
WE are the parents. WE set the rules with regards to bed time, bath time, and curfew. The same approach should be applied to food and exercise. WE should be setting rules around what type of food is brought into the house — after all, we buy it! For the parent who can’t live without their colas, try and make healthy choices when your kids are around. If you need that cola, indulge when they are in school, but bringing it into the house only offers temptation and mixed messages to your child. Set your child up for success…you will benefit too!
At our youth fitness facility, we often give children journals to keep so that they may record their physical activity and the food that they consumed during the day; I am often amazed and frustrated. I wonder where a child struggling to lose weight is getting the money to buy the ice cream, pop, chips, chocolate bars, candy, etc. that are entered in their journals? Why is a 10 year old child putting a can of pop into his or her lunch bag every day? Why are they on the computer for 6 hours straight? Why are they not walking to school? My message is simple, we are responsible.
In every other way we make choices to help our children grow up healthy and happy, this should be no exception. If you are unsure what is a healthy choice, then take the time to find out. Your children are counting on you and we are the key to their success. There are free health seminars in every community. The internet is full of healthy information and there are wonderful books out there for parents. The Canada Food Guide is a perfect tool for parents who want to keep it simple – post it on the refrigerator. Discuss healthy eating and exercise at the dinner table. Explain why you are not bringing pop and chips into the house, and always substitute the junk food with something tasty and exciting for the kids, like watermelon and other fruit.
Children learn from their parents. Make an effort to get more active if you are not already. Walk the dog with your son or daughter – you’ll be amazed at how your kids will open up and talk when they are walking with you. Go with them to their swimming lessons and encourage them to try new activities. Try karate, curling, yoga, tennis or a running club with your kids! You don’t think they would be interested? Ask them, you’d be surprised! I asked my 13-year old daughter if she would like to go to Salsa lessons or Yoga with me and she said she would love to. Her best friend and her mother called yesterday to see if they could join us! What a great bonding experience for my daughter and me – it will give us both lasting memories. Join a family facility so that you can all enjoy the amenities offered. Or, just get outside and throw a ball in the yard.
It is up to us, the parents, to stop giving into our kids and to start setting rules around healthy eating and exercise – it will not only benefit your kids and provide them with the tools for long-term health, it will do the same for you.
Holly is urbanmoms.ca’s Kids Fitness Expert. Check out our post on Holly’s gym, Bulldog Interactive Fitness, in the Cool Products and Stuff section. Along with running Bulldog, speaking to kids about nutrition, and being a mom, Holly contributes regularly to urbanmoms.ca. Please email Holly if you have questions or suggestions for future topics.