“Slept Like A Baby”
Um, seriously, who came up with this phrase? Overheard as I was in the grocery store tonight (and I have no context for this conversation- it was the two guys behind the meat counter that I walked up on):
“How’d you sleep last night?”
“Oh man, it was awesome, I slept like a baby.”
REALLY? REALLY????
Because if you slept like my baby, you’d have:
woken up at least three times,
lost your paci and forced your sleep-deprived mother to crawl on the floor in the dark to find it, needed a diaper change because 1am is an awesome time to poop,
called out for “millllllllllkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk” and sat in the corner of your crib crying until you got it,
thought 5 am was also known as time to paaaarrrrr-ty,
and then, as payment for having all your nightly needs met, rip pages out of a very important notebook while previously mentioned tired mother attempted to dress herself.
So, ya, you slept like a baby? Doubtful…just sayin’
ABSO’LUTELY!!! Thank God those days are almost over… well…. we’ve just started potty training… so my sleep may be over shortly… ho hum. But yessss…. sleeping like a baby is an oxymoron.