The first two weeks of being home with the Baby were somewhat of a honeymoon. My husband was home for a week, and then my in-laws came for the following week. The house was buzzing with people and I felt safe in the comfort of numbers. Week three is here, and we’re now getting into a more real-life routine. I’m very lucky to have my amazing nanny a few days a week, which is so helpful. However, I still find myself struggling a little to adjust to the new dynamic in my household.
The Baby is as delicious as ever, and I’m enjoying her more and more every day especially as I start to feel more normal. The hard part is being pulled in so many directions. The Girl wants me to read a book to her, the Boy wants to go outside and play street hockey with me in tow, and the Baby wants to nurse, nurse, nurse. Of course she’s up at night because that’s what new little babies do. I want to do all of those things – but the one thing I have to do is breastfeed. My older kids find it annoying that the Baby eats well, almost all the time right now. I keep telling them that this is a brief phase and that her feeding schedule will settle into a more predictable routine that will allow me to do more with them. But, they’re 3 and 5 years old, and that answer is not satisfactory.
The challenge is that, while I know I should be trying to sleep when she sleeps, that really is my only time to spend time with my other kids, and do things around the house. So, yesterday, I didn’t sleep at night, or in the day, and by 5pm I thought I was going to faint. So I lay down for a while and forgot, in the process of my nap, to prepare all the documents for our taxes…which were due to our accountant today. As you can see, the title of my blog "The Balancing Act" has taken on a whole new meaning in the past few weeks. Any tips?
i have no tips, but i hope things have improved. 🙂
i hated when people told me to sleep when the baby slept. it was just completely unrealistic, especially for baby #3!!
Hi Amreen,
This could be a very bad recommendation and get me in all sorts of trouble…but…whne the Gaffer was born, she was severely underweight and needed formula supplements with her meals, so for at least one and sometimes two feedings a day I had to pump and then add formula and bottle feed her. This is a long-winded way to suggest (please breast-feeding purists, don’t attack!) that maybe you can pump and bottle feed one or two feedings and then the kids could help, or your husband and you could sleep when he is home.
PS – I am so sorry to take so long to say CONGRATULATIONS!!!! What a lucky little baby and family!
It’s so hard the first few weeks on your own, especially when you’ve got two other little ones needing your attention. You’re so lucky to have a nanny a couple of days a week – take advantage of that time. And, don’t obsess about housework. Yes, the basics have to get done, but anything beyond that can wait until you’ve found your rhythm. Take care!
I only have two but remember the push/pull feeling of the first few months. I always found that a trip to the park where you can sit on the bench with the baby (and nurse when necessary) but the big kids are still entertained can help. Also, sleep is CRITICAL. When your nanny is there or another adult take a nap. When your hubby gets home take a nap. Whenever you can try and catch a few zzz’s.
You will get into a routine over the next few weeks as will the kids and the baby but this period is hard. Don’t forget, we’re here cheering you on!
I don’t have any good tips for you, Amreen, but know that others have been where you are and survived. It is a matter of setting priorities – nursing your baby first, spending time with your other children second (nursing and story reading can happen at the same time – street hockey is a bit tougher). Taking care of yourself has to come third or you won’t be able to take care of the first and second priorities. Try not to get too stressed – a relaxed mom helps keep baby relaxed. Take care of the little people, and ask the big people for help when you need it. Cherish the baby stages – they go by way too fast.
Hey Amreen…I only have 2 kids so I can’t speak from experience, but the key tip I’d send your way is to read your own blog…sounds like you’ve got some great perspective goin’ on and you’re right, this overwhelming stage is, in the end, so short. Keep up the breastfeeding and everything else will fall into place. As a wise woman I know once told me, “a clean house is the sign of a bad mother…”