Until the day that she died, my grandmother claimed I was single because I have a mouth like a truck driver. I’m not entirely convinced that’s the reason…but it could have something to do with it. I knew that when I had a kid, I was going to have to clean it up. And the time has come.
It’s come to be not only with my potty mouth….but I now have to watch every effing…um I mean gosh darned thing that comes out of my mouth because apparently I’ve given birth to a mimic…and I’ll admit he’s good.
I first noticed the issue a few months ago when I commented to someone on how hot one of the dad’s is at Will’s daycare. The next day he looks at me and says, ‘Casey’s daddy is really hot eh mommy??’ (the name has been changed to save me from humiliation). DOH. Backpedal, backpedal. ‘No sweets, I said Casey’s daddy stirs a pot.’ WTF – he’s two – I was trying anything.
Then I noticed that he was picking up on my road rage. One day as we were walking out of school, a car went racing down the street and before I could open my mouth I hear – ‘Hey buddy – SLOW DOWN.’ Ah yeah – in the exact intonation that I absolutely use every time a jackass speeds down a street. I sort of figured it was a one off.
But lately, he has taken this mimicry to a new level. Will is big time into pretend and making up stories these days. His favourite is to pretend that he’s putting me to bed. He basically imitates me to a T!! Here’s how it goes…
Mommy you lie down now – it’s bed time. You no lie down, you sleep in your crib. You got one more chance. You want one last drink of water? I no come back here again. Now GO TO SLEEP.
Oh God help me – because except for his cookie monster way of talking….it’s exactly me. And everytime he does it I howl, then I feel like a beyotch and vow to change my ways – and then that night at 8:05, I say ‘this is the last drink of water, I’m not coming back in here’. And I realize – this two and half year old totally has my number. F&%K!!! Wait I mean SHOOT!
Excellent blog, i was trying to subscribe to it through RSS. Can anyone tell me how i can do this please??
My moment came when it was one of THOSE mornings. I had wrestled Girl 6 into her coat and stroller by sheer force, we were running late, and then I couldn’t find keys, and so on. At the end of my rope, I was, when I tripped on a shoe in the hall and said, “bloody…” I caught myself, but Girl 3 (as she was then) filled in the rest from the stroller, her little voice piping up, “Hell!” *gulp*
I have to admit that we do swear in front of the kids. And fortunately they don’t repeat.
Cam actually tattles on his friends who swear at school. He even looks at me like he *might* get in trouble if he says “crap”
I guess we just let them know that some adults swear and it’s a grown up thing. When they’re older they will be allowed to swear if they choose to.
you spend all that time teaching them how to talk and then they learn! i didn’t realize that would be a side effect. i’ve also taught mine to be independent thinkers, and then they have the nerve to think independently! i can’t win. grrrrr..
funny how they can barely say “milk” but “vagina” is clear as a bell.
My little nephew picked up a few colourful expressions from my brother, then proceeeded to use the f word in front of their minister’s wife. In his defense, he used it “properly”!! 😉
Oh mah gawd, lady… you’re in SO much trouble!! They really do learn to mimic in perfect ways… and they reflect feelings and attitudes too… when I’m getting a lot “adverse” behaviour, I have to look at my own – chances are, someone is “doing as I do…” And, I admit the first time I heard one of the Littles drop an f-bomb, I had to try try my hardest not to smirk… Apples don’t fall far, you know.
Anyway, sounds like you’re a wonderful person to grow up to be… potty-mouth included. There are worse traits to have. Albeit, not when you’re two, I guess. (Heh.)
OMG – the repetition in the car is brutal! My 3 year old has been known to say “slow down, g’ampa” and “get in your lane you f’ing guy”. I just try to stifle my laughter and say calmly “please don’t say those things, they’re not nice”.
Yup, I’ve got a potty mouth too.
I keep it under control in more conservative environments but with friends and stuff…I’m back it.
My mom says it’s very “un-lady like”. I don’t give an eff!!! Take it or leave it…I don’t intend on holding back on a well-placed cuss word. hahah
JUst like the time Chick and I came home form a TO trip and she said shit…..and the next time we wnet to TO..I said to my sisters…if she says F#@$ when I go home I am in big trouble…still whenever i say S#$@…she says..Mama…what’s wrong…oh well its better than the f word!!! better talk to AS too!!!