Of Gossip and Men

Hi Gorgeouses!

This is a JOHNNY DEPP packed gossip session — we got news on his daughter, and more. Also, Jessica Simpson’s Cleave, Daddy Brad, Angelina’s Arse-Talk, Worst-Dressed Celeb, and MORE, MORE, MORE!!

check it!!!!!

EVA LONGORIA AND JESSICA SIMPSON BUMPIN’ AND GRINDIN’

Who knew they were even acquaintances? They look pretty chummy here…. Jess’s reeeeeally into her breasts right now….

Whoooaaaa. And, THAT TAN! Sorry Jess fans, but she looks a MESS. Eva looks purty.

And, check it — Jess’s dude cut his hair! GOOD. MOVE.

Is it me? Or — and I can’t BELIEVE what I’m about to say — does short-haired John Mayer look a bit like Johnny Depp now?

Even if he doesn’t look quite like Johnny — any excuse to post a pic of Johnny is a good one, righto? (Sure, thank me later….) Jess has done a GOOD job on John…. MAKEOVER of the CENTURY. I still don’t digg him, though….

SPEAKING OF JOHNNY….(AND POSTING ANOTHER PIC OF HIM!): NEWS ON HIS DAUGHTER’S HEALTH

Depp’s 7-year-old daughter Lilly-Rose, who contracted E-coli two months ago causing her kidneys to shut down, IS DOING GREAT! Thank GOODNESS! Here’s what the hitherto silent Depp says about it (qtd. from Britain’s The Daily Mirror):

"It gave us a great
scare. What got us through this wasn’t the strength of Vanessa or me
but our daughter and her incredible ability to make us feel OK even
though she was very unwell. She was super-strong.

"It was a very bumpy patch but she has come through it beautifully
and unscathed and she is now as healthy as she always was. She is
wonderful.

"It was a reminder to us of how to breathe, walk, talk, think and surround ourselves with people we love."

Now that Lily is better, Depp is reportedly planning to wed his girlfriend of 8 years Vanessa Paradis. They’re planning to tie the knot this summer, in Plan de la Tour — a French village near St. Tropez. Apparently, their relationship has always been very strong, and it’s even stronger now after what they’ve been through with their daughter.

REALLY, WHO DRESSES LIKE THIS?

Honestly? WHO DRESSES LIKE THIS? I don’t think most dancers dress like this. EARTH TO BRITNEY: YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS; just because it’s slimming doesn’t mean it looks good!
Photos, with thanks, c/o X17.

THE ENTOURAGE BOYS HANGIN’ IN BEV HILLS

BEST LINE OF THE SHOW THIS WEEK? Drama: "She’d go to the Gaza Strip in a yarmulke for Vince!" Hee! P.S. I LOVE ARI! ‘Specially when he spazzes — talk about GOLD!
Photo, with thanks, c/o Flynet.

PARIS HILTON IS ALWAYS SAD NOW

Every photo of Paris looks like this these days….

But, she is getting a lot of support from her parents. Of course, they’ve hired the CREME-DE-LA-CROP L.A. DUI defense lawyer (Richard Hutton) to fight the fight. And, apparently, Paris has just made the following statement (qtd. from People.com):

"After reading the media’s coverage of my court hearing, I
feel the need to correct what I believe are misperceptions about me. I
absolutely realize how serious driving under the influence is. I could
not live with myself if anyone was injured or killed while I was
driving while impaired. Clearly, no one should – no matter how
slightly. I am ready to face the consequences of violating probation.

"No one is above the law. I surely am not. I do not expect to
be treated better than anyone else who violated probation. However, my
hope is that I will not be treated worse."

I ALMOST want to feel sorry for her. But, errrrmmmmm, NOPE!
Photos and scoop, with thanks, c/o X17.

BRAD THE DAD

Since Ange is busy filming her new movie in Prague, Brad’s been taking the kids to and from school. Sweet daddy…. ENOUGH WITH THAT HAT ALREADY, though!
Photos, with thanks, c/o Splash News.

ANGELINA’S TALKS OUT OF HER ARSE AGAIN

Here are some exerpts from Angelina Jolie’s interview in the June issue of Reader’s Digest, whatevs (she has movies coming out soon, so here we go):

Before I met Brad, I always said I was
happy never to have a child biologically. He told me
he hadn’t given up that thought. Then, a few months
after Z came home, I saw Brad with her and Mad, and I
realized how much he loved him, that a biological
child would not in any way be a threat. So I said, "I
want to try."

I
met this amazing person, and we realized we had very
similar views on how we wanted to live our lives. It’s
happened quickly, with so many children. Yesterday,
picking up the kids from school, Brad turned around in
the car, and there were three of them. He couldn’t
stop laughing.

Right now, [finding quality time with Brad is] our problem! We hang out. We try to talk over
the swing set. We’ll have a date night once everybody
is settled…. Especially now with Pax, he still gets
scared if I’m gone more than a few hours. But we’ll
get them occupied with a movie and popcorn and try to
run off and lock the door for a bit.

[Does Ange want more children?] Yeah, yeah. More
biological, more adopted.

[Re. adopting another child from Vietnam?] As kids get older, it’s harder for them to be
adopted. … Something changed for me with Shiloh. We
had Mad and Z, and neither looked like Mommy or Daddy.
Then suddenly somebody in the house looked like Mommy
and Daddy. It became clear to us that it might be
important to have somebody around who is similar to
the other children so they have a connection. Mad’s
very excited that his brother is from Asia.

[What turns Brad on?] I could be
dressed up in the sexiest outfit for a photo shoot,
and by his behavior, he’ll let me know that’s nice,
but it’s nothing as sexy as when I’m home surrounded
by the kids or reading books, educating myself.

I have no comment on this because I never believe anything she says. But it’s a fun read — ‘specially if you like fairy tales and stuff.

WORST DRESSED: GWYNETH PALTROW

Ever wondered what the Jewish word "frumpy" means? Here you have it. GWYNETH!
Photo, with thanks, c/o X17.

CONFESSION TIME: I’ve been watching Survivor………A-NY-WAY…. I SO TOTALLY WANT YAU-MAN TO WIN!

He’s the SWEETEST. And, you can see he LOVES the game. He doesn’t take anything personally. Just LAUGHS when things get tough. That’s one smart cookie. That being said, I HATE Dreams for what he did to my Yau tonight. But, KUDOS to my favourite player for listening to his AWESOME instincts and using that immunity idol. WIN IT, YAU! WIN IT! xoxoxoxo!

I’m soooo excited that ANTM‘s Dionne went home. It was ABOUT TIME.

The girl totally cannot model. And, she was NARSTY to my girl Natasha. So, good riddance. Prediction for the finale?: Jaslene and Renee to the semis; Renee wins. Natasha will only get to third because she messed up this week — DUDE, being sick is the perfect time to score brownie points! You do NOT flake out when you’re sick; you step it UP — and then you WIN! Oh well. Renee to the finish.

Did Sharon and Nick REALLY go down in the Newman jet today on Y&R, or was I dreaming a really stupid corny dumbarse dream? Why why why? Here’s why I think: Nick and Sharon will bond again (because they’re the younger generation’s Nicky and Victor); Brad will realize he loves Sharon and has to leave Victoria. Soooo annoying. By the way, I loved when Jack was vomiting (well, not the actual vomiting, but, you know) — it was hilarious.

Talk to me in the comments! And, don’t forget to vote — time is running out! (I love getting your vote, really — thank you!)

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xoxo Haley-O