pregnant mom-to-be: "don’t take this the wrong way, but there’s just something about you that makes me sick."
husband of pregnant mom-to-be"kay, what’s the right way to take that?"
when i saw the ad for this new show, i knew i was going to like it. (also…the ad was during the show October Road, another show i knew i was going to like…but that’s a story for another time…)
(and p.s. before we get into how psychotic i became while i was pregnant – all three times – please go over and which miss haley-o of Cheaty’s Celebrity Gossip a giant CONGRATS on her new monkey in the oven. this is very exciting news for all of us at urbanmoms)
where was i…oh, yes, pregnancy psychosis. They call ’em hormones. those pesky little aliens that take over your body while you are expecting and turn seemingly sane people into crazy people. i myself suffered from many a hormone in my time.
it was the hormones that made me not want anyone to touch me. ever.
it was the hormones that turned me off of almost every smell. the world was a smelly, smelly place while i was pregnant.
it was the hormones that made me not able to drink anything except half-frozen water bottles. yes, it’s true. frozen enough that there were little pieces of ice floating around, but not too frozen that it wasn’t drinkable. crazy much? i found out later i was suffering from pagophagia.
it was the hormones that turned me into a total basket-case every time someone around me had a baby. and it wasn’t me. basket-case.
it was the hormones that drove me to the krispy kreme drive-thru on my way home every day.
it was the hormones that made me have hot dreams about both johnny knoxville and Bam Margera (although i may have been un-pregnant when this happened…but i won’t tell if you won’t)
it was the hormones that made me want to be naked. all the time. i swear. i would come home from work and strip down to my skivvies in seconds flat.
see…it’s nice to have something to blame things on. honey, i can’t clean the bedroom, i am suffering from a bad case of the hormones!! no, i can’t wipe josh’s ass, i have hormones. don’t try to kiss me…hormones. awesome.
the only bad thing is that now i have nothing to blame things on. Haley is so lucky.
song of the day: Wave of Multilation by The Pixies
video of the day: sorry, but for girls like me…flat-chested girls, this is hilarious
come vsit me over at Cheaper Than Therapy.
Thanks for the congrats, AL!!! And, you know not to get me started on hormones! Shall we just direct everyone to what a certain someone wrote about a certain colleague of hers that turned into a complete “LOON” (it was “loon,” wasn’t it?) when she got pregnant? 😉 If anyone goes INSANE when she’s pregnant, it’s ME!
And, don’t get me started on the SMELLS! EW! There’s no such thing as a good smell right now. And, omigosh, after my shower yesterday, I totally lay on my bed naked! I HAD to! Soooo weird that you say it’s a pregnancy thing. I had to put on a little something, though, because the monkey was with me, and she kept pointing at what she calls my “ina”…. 😉
Oh, and by the way, my hormones drove me to Taco Bell (WTF??) once a week in my first pregnancy and my lifetime cheese addiction was totally shelved because EVERY cheese suddenly smelled like vomit. Luckily for me (if not my waistline) as soon as those babies were out, cheese was back in.
Ali??? What’s wrong with YOU??? Hormones can still be an awesome excuse for anything! Ever heard of PMS?! And, just so that you know (you youngin’)…PMS gets a LOT worse as you get older…something to look forward to!
Ali, right there with you on the bionic pregger nose. The worst EVAH was driving on the trans-canada from Calgary to Dinosaur Provincial Park, and passing Brooks. Home of Canada’s largest meat packing plant. That was an hour from smell hell, let me tell you. I still can’t see a cattle truck on the road without gagging. Oh, and I STILL gag when I think of the little boy with the veritable RIVER of snot coursing down from his nose straight into his mouth. GAWD. I am gaggin now (literally) rememebering it, but at the time (34 wks up the pipe) it elicited a significantly stronger response.