OK. I admit it. I was clueless. I have spent lots of time with my kids over the years so I thought a whole weekend would be no problem. I’ve put them to bed before. I’ve fed them, changed diapers, gotten them dressed. How hard could it be? I found out.
When my wife was asked to spend a weekend in New York with a few of her pals I encouraged her to go. She was hesitant, "What about the baby?" she asked, brow furrowed. Our "baby" was well over 2 and the other two were 7 and 5. They were so independent these days they would barely need me. They could play together for a while, we’d hang out at the park. I’d get a chance to read my paper while they ran off some steam. None of this over scheduling and running around like we usually do. Other than my 7 year old son’s hockey game, we would just take it easy.
Fast forward to Saturday morning. My wife had been gone a total of 12 hours and things were not going well. I had "slept" with all three kids in the bed because the baby had a fit when he woke up and it wasn’t mommy who came to comfort him. Of course, this woke up the other two. Then, the alarm went off at 5:30am and I had to get everyone up and ready for my son’s game at 7:00am. Add in a poopy diaper and a 5 year old who couldn’t decide which of her brother’s hockey shirts she inherited was the "prettiest", and you have one frazzled dad!
No worries. The afternoon will be better. We’ll just take it easy. No plans. Just hanging out. After lunch the two year old went off for his nap and I turned on a movie for the big kids. Now it was dad’s time to read the paper and catch a few winks. This wasn’t so bad. I got exactly 14 minutes into it when I had two kids jumping on top of me complaining of boredom. After trying everything, including bribery, I got the guilt trip. "But Dad, you said this was our weekend together? Don’t you even want to play with us?".
Fast forward to Saturday night. Three tired kids and an exhausted dad. How does my wife do this? And I didn’t even make dinner. I decided to take the kids out for dinner. But not for fast food. We were going to go for a real burger and fries…diner style. Two words – bad idea. Three kids on their best behaviour have trouble waiting. I think that is why fast food was created. My three were cranky and everyone in the restaurant knew it within a few minutes. We opted to doggy bag it and finished eating at home.
Luckily, the kids were so pooped they went to bed early and I ended up falling asleep on the couch soon after. I was in a dead sleep when I heard screaming and jolted awake in mid-stride up the stairs. By the time I got upstairs, all three were awake and all three were crying. The two older kids were in my room in a panic because no one was in my bed. The baby was in hysterics in his crib.
Fast forward to Sunday morning. Yup. It’s the four of us again in my bed. How come they sleep through the night when mommy’s home? Mommy! Yeah! She comes home today. Just a few more hours and we’ve made it.
As we sat by the door Sunday afternoon in a giant cuddle waiting for my wife to come back. We chatted about the exciting weekend we’d had playing boardgames, doing races at the park, eating out, and having our "sleepovers". It now seemed so fun. I couldn’t wait to tell my wife how the "baby" had peed on the potty, how my daughter had made up a cheer at her brother’s hockey game and how my eldest had helped me clean up and read stories to his little brother and sister.
I have a renewed respect and admiration for the work my wife does, that’s for sure. But I also have some great memories and a better understanding of my kids.
Urbandad posts are contributed by different dads from all over the country. These dads are invovled parents and consider their families their top priority. How they do this is as varied as they are! Stay tuned for more posts by urbandad. If you or someone you know would like to contribute an urbandad post, please email urbandad@urbanmoms.ca.