Jen wrote an amazing post about Twitter and if the people we meet on there are actually friends. I understand people’s hesitation to believe that friendships, true friendships, can be formed over short bursts of 140 words – I do, I get that. But I’m thrilled to be part of an army on Twitter – I’ve never met any of these women in person but I know what I’d do if I did. There would be intense hugging, buckets of tears and knowing smiles. Are they my friends? No. They are my sisters. We are bonded together over our fight with postpartum depression.
Today I spent an hour on a ppd chat on Twitter. It wasn’t the first and it won’t be the last. We help each other, learn from each other and of the utmost importance, we take comfort in knowing we are not alone.
In the past, I’ve joined into the ppd chats when I felt myself slipping. After my second breakdown earlier this year, I went on the chat to have my army reassure me that going to the doctor was the right thing. I knew it was but to have the support of those who know is like a circle of strength pushing you forward.
Now I join the chats to share my survival. I needed to read and hear from people who were there when I was struggling, to know that it was possible – that I could feel happy again. I want to reassure other fighters that there is no shame in taking drugs, no shame in asking for help and no shame in feeling the way they do.
One thing on today’s chat that made me so incredibly sad was the number of women who felt no support from their spouses, family or friends. Countless women were saying that they were told to suck it up and snap out of it. It made me realize how incredibly blessed I was when I was in the thick of it. Everyone stepped up and supported me – my family was incredible.
I sadly don’t have a ton of memory of Will as an infant – until he was nearing one. What I do have is strong memories of my family helping me through my postpartum. I remember my dad and stepmother hugging me and saying they’d do anything to help us get past it. I remember my sister spending countless nights sleeping with Will on the couch (she still loves that). I’d sneak out and watch them and wish I could feel that peace. I remember my brother holding Will for three hours one day, looking up at me with tears in his eyes and telling me that Will was perfect (and I believed him). And I remember my sister arriving from Texas the day I got home from the ER and feeling a relief that I never thought possible…and finally sleeping.
Every mother suffering with postpartum should have that support. They should never be made to feel like they’re overreacting or that they need to get a grip. Sadly, it’s not the case. And that is where the Twitter army comes in. We are friends, we are sisters, we are warriors*. We need each other and we need you.
Please, if you take anything from my endless online diatribes…ask a new mother if they need help. Ask how they’re doing. Take their feelings seriously. One in eight mothers suffer from postpartum. How many moms do you know? Do the math. It’s too important. Please.
For them..and their families.
*If you want to be inspired, head to postpartum progress http://postpartumprogress.com and look at the Warrior Moms photo album. Women from all over the world saying ‘I have or I am battling postpartum and I’m surviving.’ Today – I’m the Warrior Mom of the Day – and I couldn’t be prouder.
I didn’t even realize there was such a thing on twitter! That is amazing (but if you recall I am the virgin to twitter lol)
I suffered from PPD after my 3rd was born and it is true – although there is a lot of talk about it there isn’t REALLY much support.
Glad you have the support you need – wish I had that when needed. Great post!
That’s amazing Sara. I think it’s phenomenal that people can get the support they need from twitter.
What a great post, friend. 🙂