Hi, My Name’s Kath and I’m a Food-aholic

Week: 25

Pounds Lost: about 43

There was no Weight Watchers meeting this weekend because of the Remembrance Day holiday, so I had to rely on my home scale to get my weight. Problem is, this digital wonder (which can also calculate body fat percentage) has somehow gotten converted from pounds to kilograms, and won’t seem to switch back (despite repeated toggling of the lb/kg switch), so I can’t be absolutely positive, but I think I lost about a pound this week…

I had out-of-town visitors this weekend (in-law and step-in-law) who hadn’t seen the hubster or me since we started our Weight Watchers adventure. Their reactions to us and our respective "new bodies" got me thinking about each person’s unique relationship with food. To wit: hubsters father was amazed and kept asking us, "so what’s the secret to losing weight?", which was quite opposite to his wife’s congratulatory but more low-key, understanding approach. See, she’s never had a weight problem, so talking to her was more like talking to someone else who knows that a healthy relationship to food is one of physical, not emotional, nourishment. Talking to him became exhausting – he kept insisting we come up with some "magic bullet" or secret to weight loss, other than the obvious, of course. "Eat Less! Move More!"

HFW (hubster’s father’s wife) told me a story about my husband and his sister shortly after their dad remarried (hubster would have been 20, or so). I think she intended it as a contrast between how her children were raised, and how hubs and his sis were raised. So, it goes like this: FIL, HFW, the hubster, his sis and HFW’s son (did you follow that?) are all on a ski trip. HFW and her son take great pains to pack wonderful sandwiches, snacks, fruit, etc. for their lunches on the ski hill, while the hubster and his sis prefer to buy cafeteria food. HFW is dismayed…why would they want that awful food instead of a delicious home-made sandwich?

But I totally understood. Given the choice, I would have chosen greasy, fried, cafeteria food over a home-packed meal EVERY TIME. Why? Because I was/am ADDICTED TO FOOD. That usually means addicted to BAD food. So badly addicted that you like it bad. In fact, the badder the better! You mean I can have fries with my chili? And sour cream on top…oh yes, of course. What’s chili without sour cream? And cheese? Oh yes, please…a little bit more, if I can, please. Oh, and throw in a bag of chips on the side. I can eat those later on when I get the munchies on the chairlift.

It was that food addiction, and not some fundamental flaw in their upraising that drove them to make that bad choice on the ski hill all those years ago. My father-in-law, who had seconds at dinner "because you’re just going to throw it out otherwise" would understand, I’m sure!

The more I thought about their different reactions, the more the "-aholic" metaphor ocurred to me. Try telling a smoker to just have half the cigarette, then throw it out. Tell them to smoke "only enough until you’re satisfied". Or tell an alcoholic to just drink enough to "feel satisfied" and then step away from the bar. Or give a gambler a single roll of loonies just for "a taste" of the VLT. Yeah, right! I can hear you laughing from here! It would actually be considered cruel, and you’d be accused of sabotaging their recovery efforts.

Well, it’s no different for food addicts, except for the one small, minor detail that you have to eat to live! You cannot "go cold turkey" when you need to lose weight, or you will die. So all that snarky stuff I quoted above, about only having enough to feel satisfied, or having just a taste…that’s all real-life when you’re losing weight. That’s the challenge you face every day.

And to add to it, you face the daily humiliation of knowing that EVERYBODY you meet in your day-to-day life, from your child’s teacher, to your neighbours, to the check-out kid at the grocery store: they all know how out-of-control you are in your relationship with food. It’s right there, out in the open for everyone to see. Think about it: except in the case of a real, street-person drunk, you would not know an alcoholic just to look at one. Or a drug addict. Or a gambling addict. If the perfectly dressed, manicured, coiffed and made-up mom in the schoolyard who drives a Lexus to pick up her kids can’t get out of bed in the morning without a stiff shot from her hip flask, you can’t tell it just by looking at her. But food addicts: you can tell us from a mile away. I had never thought about this until a dear friend complained about it, but it’s too true.

And my friend and I were talking about this just today, when she said, "I’m so in control of every other aspect of my life that I’m not willing to give up control in that area anymore". WOW. That says it all, doesn’t it? It IS all about control — about choices — about not making excuses.

And that, right there folks, that’s the secret to losing weight, the magic bullet.

Now it’s your turn…what do you think? Do you eat to live or live to eat? Would you take a sandwich or opt for the cafeteria grease-fest? Don’t be shy…leave a comment! Dish!