Hi Gorgeouses,
Let’s just cut to the chase. She’s OUT. SHE’S OUT OF JAIL! PARIS IS OUT AFTER ONLY 3 DAYS! More on that later. What else: yellow shoes, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jayden James Federline, Nicole Ritchie, AND MORE!
check it!!!
OUT OF JAIL ALREADY! PARIS!
Three apparently VERY miserable days in jail, spent she. Sources say that during her time in prison, Paris cried loudly and constantly, that she looked dirty and sickly-pale because totally makeupless. Why was she released? Because a doctor at the prison determined that she couldn’t stay, and that house arrest was in order. I’ve heard several medical scenarios: 1) rash; 2) schizophrenia meds overdose; 3) refusal to eat prison food; 4) depression, panic attacks, nervous breakdown. Whatever the reason, she’s at home now. Or, rather, she’s at MANSION — with pool, and big kitchen and 2 living rooms (one of which has a stripper pole…). And, she’s "stuck" there for the next 40 days — increased from the ol’ 23-day slammer sentence. And, she’s gotta wear a new accessory: the ankle monitor made famous by one Martha Stewart….
I’m sure she’ll glue diamonds on it — like, FO SHO! Free ride. The princess got a free ride. SHOCKER OF ALL SHOCKERS! What a freaking JOKE!
THIS JUST IN: PARIS HAS TO REPORT TO COURT THIS MORNING (FRIDAY) AT 9AM TO DETERMINE IF SHE’S GOING BACK TO THE SLAMMER! Apparently, the judge who sentenced her to jail has a major issue with her release…. We’ll talk about it in the comments when we hear stuff — keep your ears/eyes open, Gorgeouses!
NICOLE RITCHIE: SKINNY AND…PREGGERS? (NO WAY!)
NICOLE RITCHIE must be sooo happy about Paris’s release. Because, if she’s sentenced for her DUI, there’s NO WAY she’ll be sent to jail now! She’d be sure to wither away (even more) in jail so she can secure house arrest…. What a GREAT idea!?! Who needs Prison Break when you have The Simple Life….
SKIN AND BONES, man, SKIN AND BONES (click images to enlarge for better arm bone viewing). And, rumour has it she might be…PREGNANT???
Photo of Nicole, with thanks, c/o X17 and Celebrity Puke.
BRITNEY SPEARS AND JAYDEN!
I LOVE YOU SEAN PRESTON FEDERLINE! xoxo! EEEEEeeeeee! And, Jayden’s, like, his twin. So cute. But, I must remain loyal to my fave celebrity cutie (my cheaty monkey not included, of course!) Sean Preston.
I LOVE YELLOW SHOES
This is a blog, so I’m supposed to talk a little about myself, no? So, I’ll say this: can you believe how fast I went from CAM-LOATHER to CAM-LOVER? About as fast as she went from brunette back to blond? She’s HOTT! I love the yellow shoes! After I have this baby, I’m going out and splurging on some hott yellow shoes…. Oh, but it’ll be Fall…. Oh well, suckage.
And, hey, wasn’t it Sarah Jessica Parker wearing the yellow heels last week? Yeah, was.
SO HOT! I love this trend! (Is it my hormones? Or, is this look, like, total HOTTERS?)
MAGGIE GYLLENHAAL BREASTFEEDING IN PUBLIC
There are tons of uncensored photos circulating around the internet. People are being all judgy and ewwy about it. I say, GO MAGGIE! The woman totally rocks. And, people just need to chill: when you’re kid needs a boob, s/he needs a boob, aiight?
TOO BAD HE’S SO HOTT….
…because he’s DUNZO for Grey’s Anatomy. I mean, in case you haven’t heard yet. He’s pissed, apparently — told US magazine "I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore."
SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE is freaking fantastic. I’m so excited! GREAT PICKS for the top 20. GREAT! On with the show! PSYCHED! (I love the weird guy….)
Did William Bardwell just die on Y&R? DANGIT! I soooo wanted Glo to go to jail! But, then, maybe if he’s dead, Phyllis will be off the hook. And, we all want that. And, Nicki and David’s kiss? EW??!
Jacqueline is DUNZO on CANADA’S NEXT TOP MODEL, and I’m coo wid it. You? I mean, she was kind of blank the whole time. I felt bad for her when she cried her eyeballs out at elimination, but, she didn’t have a chance of going much further in the competition.
I could have done without the calamari. EW? Just. Gross. SO not high fashion — like, who were they kidding? ALL of them looked freaking ridiculous.
Jay was MUCH better this week. Less Tyra-ish and scripted, more the Jay dawg we love.
Jeannie Becker is NUTSO. But, I LOVE IT! I love her definition of high fashion: when a photo "elevates us to look at it" — beauty.
Talk to me in the comments! I’ll respond to all of ’em there, kay?
Want more Cheaty? Check it — at The Cheaty Monkey!
xo Haley-O!
As for CNTM I am SICK of all of the product shots!! Do we really care if they ate Ritz Bitz at that moment and “loved” them?! I found it distracting and I wanted to turn the channel. ANTM doesn’t do it to that sickening degree. Yet, I keep watching…but will nevah buy Ritz Bitz!
poor paris but it serves her right for trying to scam the judge.it will be really rough for her but hopefully she’ll learn a lesson.DON’T DRINK AND DRIVE DUMBARSE CELEBS!and everyones right about nicole shes too malnourished to have her period.so can’t be preggers.brit brit sure has some cute little boys.love the yellow shoes.way to go maggie.nursing moms should be able to feed their babies wherever they want to!why is isaiah off of grey’s?because of that comment he said about T.R.? good so lets fire everyone who says something narsty racist mean etc.start firing now then.gosh where would they start?isaiah is the poster boy for whipping post posters.
poor paris but it serves her right for trying to scam the judge.it will be really rough for her but hopefully she’ll learn a lesson.DON’T DRINK AND DRIVE DUMBARSE CELEBS!and everyones right about nicole shes too malnourished to have her period.so can’t be preggers.brit brit sure has some cute little boys.love the yellow shoes.way to go maggie.nursing moms should be able to feed their babies wherever they want to!why is isaiah off of grey’s?because of that comment he said about T.R.? good so lets fire everyone who says something narsty racist mean etc.start firing now then.gosh where would they start?isaiah is the poster boy for whipping post posters.
OMIGOSH, Gorgeouses! Imagine how FREAKED OUT Nicole must be now, too! She may actually have to serve time in the slammer, too, now!
STEPH — the previews for next week DO look good! It’s SUCH a better show this year than it was last year. Jay’s got the connections….
ALI — That’s exactly what I was thinking: malnutrition bloat — totally!
TUG — SEE SARAH’S COMMENT! She’s going BACK — for FORTY FIVE (vs. TWENTY THREE) days!!!!!
SPARKS — So true!!! She couldn’t sleep! No pills! You’re wife’s a genius!
LAURA — So funny you say that about Nicole. How is it possible that she’s getting a period at that weight? I can’t imagine it could be possible….
SARAH! THAT’S YUGE!!! Thanks for breaking it right here for us! FORTY FIVE DAYS is going to send Paris RIGHT off the deep end. Poor girl — see that? I actually feel sorry for her!!!!
BREAKING NEWS!!!
She’s going back to jail Hales!
Just heard it here on the news .. breaking news in fact lol ..So she was heard screaming as she was taken out of the court room.
The judge ordered her to fullfill 45 days in JAIL!
Finally .. justice is served!!!
Nicole can’t be pregnant…don’t you need a bit of body fat in order to ovulate? Me thinks she hasn’t had a period in a loooooonnnggg time.
Paris needs to get her whiney ass back in the slammer. I hope the judge throws the book at her.
love, Love, LOVE the pics of Maggie nursing…way to go!!
I like my wife’s idea. She could not sleep because of the lack of sleeping pills or downers and she was freaking out. Paris I mean of course.
I am not stunned Isiah is gone, though he will be hard to replace.
Paris SO needs to go back in – I heard her mom was planning a “get out of jail” party for DURING THE HOUSE ARREST. Sick. sick & wrong.
Between the weight & drugs, Nicole will never go full term if she IS preggo, right? again, sick.
LOVE Cam – she’s always got a splash of color somewhere!
GO Maggie – I’m with you there…and Isaiah? (I’m sure I spelling it wrong)…he needed to go. sorry, but he did.
jay was sooo much better this week. love him. ha…Sinead on the floor…i’m sorry, i just love it when they collapse. 🙂
whatever…everyone knew she wouldn’t actually spend the time in jail. who were they trying to kid?
also…i think Nicole’s just got a malnutrition bloat. i don’t think she’s pregnant.
I agree- Jay was soooo much better this week. I dare say that he’s even better at it than Tyra…previews for next week look good!