Gossip Kisses

Hi Gorgeouses!

We got SO much great stuff today: Simon Cowell reveals who he thinks the Idol winner will be; Jessica Simpson’s dog is KISSABLE; Paris asks the fans for help; Cate Blanchett looks like arse; and MORE!!!!!

check it!!!!!

SIMON SPEAKS

The venerable X17 Online brings us THIS awesome video of our FAVE American Idol judge. In this vid, Simon gives his prediction for WHO the big WINNER of AI will be. He also talks about Paris Hilton’s current predicament, and her singing career…. CHECK IT!

I just LOVE the accent. I HATE that he minimizes the seriousness of drunk driving, but usually I agree with everything he says — mostly cuz of the accent…and partly cuz of the eyebrows. But, I HATE that he drives THIS CAR!!!:

Just, ew! My PERVY grad-school professor used to drive this exact car! HAAAAAAAATE. This prof was such a perv, you don’t even KNOW!
Photo of car, with thanks, c/o Splash News.

PARIS’ PLEA

Paris has put out a plea on her myspace website. Get this…:

"My friend Joshua started this petition, please help and sihn it. i LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!"

I just LOVE "sihn." Hee!

HERE’S an excerpt from THE PETITION, Gorgeouses…. Brace yourselves — it’s pretty freaking ridiculous:

To: 

The Honorable Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger

Paris Whitney Hilton is an American celebrity and socialite. She is
an heiress to a share of the Hilton Hotel fortune, as well as to the
real estate fortune of her father Richard Hilton. She provides hope for
young people all over the U.S. and the world. She provides beauty and
excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives.

This petition is to ask Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to pardon Paris
Hilton for her mistake. Please allow her to her return to her career
and life. Everyone makes mistakes. She didn’t hurt or kill anyone, and
she has learned her lesson. She is sincere, apologetic, and full of
regret for her actions as she explained tearfully to the Judge handling
her case in court yesterday.She is distraught and understandably
afraid.

(Read whole petition here.)

Can AWNOLD even GRANT a pardon? I mean, he’s not, like, the president or anything…. And, I don’t know about you, but Paris does not provide "HOPE" for "young people all over the…world" — nor does "she provide beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives." YIKES. That’s so brutal. She MAYBE provides the kind of EXCITEMENT for young people that PUTS THEM IN JAIL. And, she’s pretty much destroyed the reputation and purpose of the entire chiwawa breed — which is a serious crime if you ask me….

WANNA KNOW WHY PARIS NEEDS TO GO TO JAIL? AND ALL HER FELLOW CELEB DUI? CHECK IT: MADD.

MOTHERS UNITED! Petition to save the beauty queen heiress? MY ARSE! (This is so BEYOND ridiculous and pathetic. HURL!)

Oooo…THIS JUST IN: One of Governor Schwarzenegger’s reps says Awnold will not get
involved in this kind of case "until the individual has exhausted his
or her judicial remedies." There you go. I’ll keep you posted.

WHAT THE CELEBS ARE SAYING ABOUT PARIS’S JAIL SENTENCE

Photo, with thanks, c/o Splash News.
The following is quoted from Splash News Online:

Cameron Diaz:

“For whatever reasons she made her bad choices and she’s going to have
to deal with it. On the day there were like 10 helicopters above her
house and I live not very far away – I was like, ‘Can you please keep
it down.’ So now we all suffer when Paris suffers.”

Justin Timberlake:
“What can I say, the law is the law.”

Teri Hatcher:
“The laws the law and that’s what I teach my kid and that’s how I think it should work”

Jason Priestly – who had his own run in with the law for drunk driving in  1999:
“I was on probation for three years – I didn’t even jaywalk for those three years. Sometimes you have to pay the piper.”

Jay Leno joked:
“I’m sure you all know by now that Paris Hilton got 45-days in jail. A
lot of people are very upset about it . . . they were hoping for the
death penalty.”

VINCE!

YEEEEAAAH! Freakin’ LOVELY! It’s Entourage‘s Adrian Grenier, baby. You can just thank me later….
Photo, with thanks, c/o Buzz Foto.

DO YOU THINK KIRSTEN DUNST AND HER BOYFRIEND THOUGHT THAT THE METROPOLITAN MUSEUM OF ART COSTUME INSTITUTE GALA WAS ACTUALLY A COSTUME PARTY?

…Because…SURPRISE…It wasn’t. Just ask Jessica Simpson. She wore this:

Photo, with thanks, c/o Splash News.

I guess no one told her to leave her WAX DOUBLE at home. WTF? She doesn’t look real? And, hello BOOBAGE — like, wow!

And, then, there’s THIS:

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Cate Blanchett! What hath thou DONE to THYSELF! Ana much? Maybe she’s just preparing (by getting really sickly looking) for her new movie Cancer Vixen. Here’s hoping. GAH! Again, NOT A COSTUME PARTY — CHECK THE MEMO.

CUTE DOG…

I love Jessica Simpson’s dog, Daisy. Awww…. LOVE. Just thought I’d let you know. Above: Jess just bought 8 pairs of shoes for $7,000. Biatch.
Photo, with thanks, c/o Splash News.

AHHHHH…CLICK IT (and vote)! Hey, thanks!

So, what d’you all think of The Bachelor? I think he made the right decision sending whatsherface home. She was TOO YOUNG, and it was TOTALLY like he was in a university dorm room when he had dinner with her and her roommate! Most annoying phrase of the show? "RED FLAG"! Shut up with that, ANDY! Sheesh. Tessa’s taking it home. Goes to show: all you have to do to "win" The Bachelor is play hard-to-get. Make him think he’s not-all-that so he’ll spend the whole show trying to boost his ego ON YOU…. Awesome strategy. I actually really like Tessa. She’s got spunk. Tessa all the way.

Want more Cheaty? Check it — at The Cheaty Monkey.

xo Haley-O