Gossip and THE GROG

Hi Gorgeouses!

Today we got TONS OF GOSSIP!: ANTM — Goodbye GROG!; Jennifer Aniston dating new guy!; HOWARD STERN and fiance in Miami; Brit and Kevin’s divorce finalized; Katie happiest without Tom; celebs in too-small bikinis; John Mayer TOPLESS (and not half bad…); AND MORE!

check it!!!!!

JENNIFER ANISTON’S NEW DUDE?

Well, he’s no Brad Pitt…. But, Ryan Kavanaugh is a VERY successful Hollywood producer, and Jen is having some fun with him these days. They were recently spotted at Il Sole, in LA, at a table near Courtney Cox and David Arquette. After the lovely dinner, Jen snuck out the back door. So, it’s all hush hush. Let’s just keep it to ourselves. But, SQUEEEEEE! So excited for possibility of Jen having new man. Meanwhile, ANGELINA IS GETTING TOTALLY SLAMMED by tabloid mags — they hate her for giving her staged pics of her ever-growing brood exclusively to People and Hello! — and they’re turning on her BIG TIME! Hee.

BRIT AND KEVIN’S DIVORCE FINALIZED: HE’S IN THE MONEY! HE’S IN THE MONEY!

So the divorce is final. It’s OVAH! Time for everyone to move on. So, here’s what Kevin’s getting, according to Star Magazine:

• their 2004 prenup granted Kevin $250,000 per year of their marriage, but Brit increased it to $500,000/year of marriage in order to expedite the negotiations;
• Kev gets half the proceeds from their Malibu home, which is going for $13.5 million;
• Brit will pay Kev $25,000 a month in child support for each of their two
  children until they’re 18;
• Kev gets custody of their sons four
  days a week;
• Kev keeps all gifts Brit bought them while they were married;
• Kev’s forbidden to write a tell-all about their marriage.

There you have it. Kev scored big. According to Star Magazine, moreover, Brit actually thought they were going to get back together when she was finished her stint at Promises. Kevin apparently told her they would reconcile in order to keep her there, sources say. When the two met to discuss the final details of their divorce, Brit reportedly asked Kev, "Do you really want to do this?" When he said yes, Brit replied, "You’re the biggest mistake I’ve ever made, but thank you for my babies."

KATIE: SO MUCH HAPPIER WITHOUT TOM

Here’s Katie going for a costume fitting for her new movie Mad Money (which, I can assure you, I won’t be seeing). Have you ever seen such a happy Katie? Not in a long time. Why so happy!? Well…notice that TOM’S NOT WITH HER!? The poor girl is really struggling in her marriage. According to Life and Style Magazine, Katie stormed out of the house after yet another fight with Tom. Sources say she’s asked Tom to go to counseling with her, but he won’t have it — so she cries constantly to Victoria Beckham. Oy, what a mess….
Photo, with thanks, c/o Flynet.

NAVEEN ANDREWS IN BEVERLY HILLS

You’re welcome, Lost fans.
Photo, with thanks, c/o CelebrityPuke.com.

HOWARD STERN AND BETH OSTROSKY VACATIONING IN MIAMI

I LOVE YOU HOWARD!!! (Even though you’re singlehandedly destroying American Idol!) MMWAH!
Photos, with thanks, c/o Just Jared.

JOHN MAYER TOPLESS

Not bad, not bad. Surprisingly, not bad. I still don’t fancy him AT ALL, though….
Photo, with thanks, c/o Splash News.

CELEBS IN BIKINIS!: PAM AND UMA….

Crazy bawd! Crazay….

Worst, most unflattering bikini (and pose…) EVAH!

COURTENEY COX ARQUETTE CONSOLES CRANKY COCO!

AWWWWW! Coco’s so sweet and adorable! And, look at the sunglasses — they match her outfit! LOVE!
Photo c/o PerezHilton.com.

CHLOE SEVIGNY LOOKS LIKE ARSE!

What the…!?!?

AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL: SAY GOODBYE TO THE GROG!

Did she not always have the worst GROG? She always looked groggy! Except in her photoshoots. In her photo shoots, she just looked CHEESE. It’s about friggin time they booted her! When she wasn’t looking groggy or cheesy, she was looking like this:

UGH! That smile!!! Always with the smile when she was in front of the panel or judges, etc.. And…MOE!? I REALLY didn’t like her. I mean, I’m sure she’s a good enough person. She just HAD TO GO!

I LOVED Dionne for the first time in this episode….

She totally stepped it up this week, and she could actually win this thing! Jael was a total IDIOT with Fi(f)ty. And, I liked Renee — I was starting to really enjoy her bitchiness. HATED when she got all vulnerable and teary and apologetic in the group talk….Anyway, bye Sarah.

So, it’s Easter weekend, and it’s Passover. Happy holidays, everyone! Hope you have a great long weekend! I’m so looking forward to spending time with my new nephew and chilling and catching up on sleep. Here’s hoping!

OMIGOSH!!!!! I’M WATCHING Y&R RIGHT NOW (TUESDAYS) AND I CANNOT BELIEVE DREW AND SHARON FELL OFF A CLIFF!!!!!!!! AHHHHH! OMIGOSH…I HAVE TO GO CALL SOMEONE….! CAN YOU BELIEVE!?

Want more Cheaty? Check it — at The Cheaty Monkey!

And, DO come talk to me in the comments below, kay! I love it!

xo Haley-O