so…the photo session went…well, not so well. i decided to go with the white and jean, but add some brown into it. not a huge stretch, i realize…but it’s hard to come up with something!
the photographer was completely uninterested in anything other than hurrying up the session so she could relax, which i’m sure you can guess, i appreciated.
tomorrow, i’ll post pictures for you to see…they aren’t bad, per se, just not stellar (you just can’t buy anything good for $30 these days…)
the point it, i was pretty unhappy, but i would NEVER speak up. i’d take the semi-decent pictures and walk away…thirty dollars poorer, but with decent pictures of my kids. i like to stay out of trouble.
it stems back to growing up with a father like mine. the type that doesn’t like to stay out of trouble. the kind that will heckle over a $1.00 overcharge. The kind that will stand up for himself…no matter what. i know what you’re thinking…that’s GREAT. good for him for standing up for himself. but i was always the little girl beside him, mortified that people around us were watching his outbursts. and while even as a kid, i knew that what he was doing was the RIGHT thing, it didn’t stop me from wishing i could crawl under a rock.
Last night we were out with friends for dinner. Tova ordered a meal that she didn’t like and sent it back. They, as any other restuarant, i would hope, offered her another meal in its stead. she chose another meal, a meal that was $5.00 less expensive. When the bill came, they had charged us for the original meal and not the new one.
and while everyone began heckling with the waiter – rightly so, 100% – i saw shades of my childhood, sitting beside my dad at a table. i was in the "screw the $5" camp…but i was the only one. And i understand where they are coming from – it’s not the money, it’s the principle – i am way too self-conscious and timid (in that respect, at least) after years of mortification, that i just can’t.
of course, because we were right, the waiter credited the $5. but then added extra things to the bill afterwards and cheated us on a buy one get one free coupon we had, but that’s a whole other story right there.
what do you do in situations like these? do you stand up for youself no matter what the cost? do you not both making a big deal out of it, and just let bygones be bygones? do you lie somewhere in the middle – – – sometimes make a stink, but sometimes let it go?
i’m not judging- – – – – i LOVE that both Ilana and Tova are so great with things like this – I want them to be on my side in situations like this. i wish they were at the photo studio yesterday to get my $30 back!! I think it’s just really interesting how every person handles these situations differently!
and just because you know you can’t get enough of Isabella…i thought i’d throw some photos in (that, i think, are better than the professional ones you’ll see tomorrow…)
Yeah, I stand up — if it’s worth it. I’m pretty laid back about most things, believe it or not. But, if I feel wronged or violated or whatevs, I definitely stand up.
LOVE BELLA!!! SOOOOOOOO ADORABLE!!! OY!
OMG – do we share the same dad? Seriously, sounds exactly like my dad! My heart actually starts beating fast when I know my dad’s about to start up! I just know what’s coming. I tend to pick and choose my battles. When I know I’m right I do stand up for myself but in a very different way.
Bella is soooo adorable!!! She looks like she’s holding a microphone and posing like a pop star! SO CUTE!!
that is my Dad, completely! And us three girls have wanted to crawl, repeatedly … under the table. He is 82, and calmed only slightly. He will still, always stick up for what he knows is right.
But I must confess, all three daughters, and my mom too, are definate sticklers for justice. When I see my husband being ‘had’ I get so mad at him, he was raised more to just grin and bear and not make a fuss.
I have returned meals if they are not nice (and gotten the replacement free mind you .. ) I have taken back garments that have slight problems, and even without tags, without receipt and even if I have worn it once and then realized it had a flaw. I will stand there, until they give in lol. I think we pay WAY to much for stuff as it is, and the principle of just getting what you wanted, and not being ripped off, is worth the confrontation. Absolutely.
I do think my Dad gave us this skill, and I should thank him for all those embarrassing moments really, since he was right.
Gosh .. this is long – but I have to tell you, EXPO 1987, family at a fine restaurent on the water in Vancouver, service was sooo slow. In the end, after the meal, we left .. with my dad leaving NO tip. The meal was probably $300plus, but he was not leaving any tip. WEll, the waiter ran out after my dad and was like sir, is there a problem, and well, let’s just say we wanted to dive right off the dock .. it was so embarrasing – but .. he was right.
Well, I had my share of embarrassing father moments (he drove away from the Burger King drive-thru once with no fries, and ever after would sit and sort through all the bags saying, “gotta check that the fries are all here, you know, you forgot them once!”), but I do still stick up for myself. My mom was a kick-ass sticker-upper. Wow, I can still remember her returning blouses to Talbot after Christmas one year. She was so angry with them that she actually said, “girls, go and wait outside the store”. Well, at least we didn’t have to witness the moment, right?
But now, I ALWAYS stick up for myself! I believe I do it in an assertive, but not angry or condescending manner. Just a case of “here are the facts, you have forgotten something or sold me an inferior product and I will not relent until the matter is put right”. But I did manage a call centre for a lotta years, so I kinda know the ins and outs of complaining!
Okay, I should point out I always stick up for myself when money is involved. I have a rather unfortunate tendency to let people walk all over me in personal relationships, though! See, I’ll fight for the $1 overcharge, but never like to get into conflict when the matter at stake is personal feelings.
I can totally relate! My dad was the same & can vividly remember eating dinner with family at some Italian restaurant when my dad sent back the Chicken Cacciotore because he insisted that it was not made properly – HUMILIATING! To this day my dad can be quite embarassing as he is NOT tactful at all! He always gets what he wants though…
Your daughter is so cute!
Cute pix!
My husband and father will both stand up for EVERYTHING. I know that mortified little girl feeling, because I’ve been there so many times. It’s not that they’re standing up for themselves that bothers me, it’s the way they do it… condesending, angry, belittling.
I can go either way, depending on the situation and the company. I must say, though, when I do stand up for myself I feel terrific, powerful and smart.
Lovely photos!