GAGGY GOSSIP

Hi Gorgeouses,

Before we get into the good stuff, the stuff that really matters, I just want to point out that I PREDICTED IT! Yes I did. Because I’m psychic. I really am. I just knew: even though the "Sadie" in me (i.e., the one who leads with her head) said Sadie was going to win, the "Jen" in me (i.e., the one who leads with her heart) came through, and I predicted it RIGHT. (If you don’t believe me, see bottom of this post!) Yes. I predicted it all. JEN WON! She is Lorenzo’s new girlfriend — ooOOoo!

Sadie was just too competitive and too I’m-a-virgin-and-saving-myself-for-marriage-so-I’m-perfect-and-strong-and-the-goodest-and-most-princessy. So, he made the right decision. Although, I still don’t think they’ll last. I know, pessimistic. But, I just don’t. Call me psychic.

CHECK IT!!!!!

HILARY DUFF AND JOEL MADDEN SPLIT

Shocker of all shockers, Hilary and Joel have split! Say it isn’t so! And, seriously, I totally had a premonition about this the other day (see? psychic!). I was just thinking about how solid they seem to be amidst the apparent break-up plague by which Hollywood has been beset lately…. The reason they split hasn’t been divulged. Many peeps think it’s the 8-year age gap (Hil=19; Mad=27).

BRITNEY. GAG.

I saw Britney’s vagina on the internet. Gag. Yes, I saw the pics. Gag. And I’m not linking to them. Gag. And I’m, of course, not posting them. Gag. Because they’re seriously ew. Gag. And sad. Gag. And do you really want to see Britney’s vagina? Gag. I sure regret seeing it. Gag. *Shudder.* Britney is officially out of control, insane, what have you. I’m not posting her vagina. Gag. But, I have other disturbing pics. Check it. Gag.

GAG ME…

…WITH A SPOON.

Downward spiral. This girl is crashing. It’s really very sad. She’s clearly in pain. Clearly.

Gag. Sad.

Above photos of Britney, with thanks, c/o Splash News Online.

PARIS MIGHT ACTUALLY BE A GOOD FRIEND….

Photo, with thanks, c/o X17 Online.

It’s a little too late to close Brit’s legs, Pary…. But, a sweet gesture, nonetheless. Gag.

HOLLYWOODS NEWEST HOTT COUPLE

Derek Jeter and Jessica Biel have been caught making out around town lately. Cute! (She’s totally gorj….)

NICOLE SLAMS RACHEL ZOE

Photo collage c/o Just Jared.

Nicole wrote this on her official MySpace website:

What 35 year old raisin face whispers her order of 3 peices of asparagus for dinner at Chateau everynight, and hides her deathly disorder by pointing the finger at me, and used her last paycheck I wrote her to pay for a publisist instead of a nutritionist?
HINT: Her nickname is lettucecup… (qtd. from Perez Hilton).

Wow. This is fascinating stuff, Gorgeouses, don’t you think!? Nicole’s admitting Zoe drove her toward becoming anorexic. We’ve been waiting for this for a long time. According to Just Jared, Nicole’s MySpace rant was a response to the following comment made by Zoe yesterday:

There has been a lot of speculation as to the cause of my parting with client Nicole Richie. The tabloid reports have no merit. After trying to be a good friend to Nicole, we made a mutual decision to sever our working relationship. Changes are inevitable in any business relationship. I am very fortunate to have such a wonderful life, I have been married for 10 years and have been a stylist for more than 15 years and am lucky to work with such a diverse group of women of all shapes and sizes that inspire me everyday. I have nothing but love for Nicole and wish her only health and happiness.

Britney this. Britney that. That’s about all the InterGossips are talking about. So, tonight’s post was a little more challenging and nauseating than usual — especially since I’m not into displaying Brit Brit’s private parts on our pretty blog….

So, your turn. What’s on your mind? All of the above? — Discuss!

And, then come visit me at The Cheaty Monkey. I’m waxing all philosophical there, today!

xo Haley-O!