There’s that old saying “I was the perfect parent…until I had kids.”
We all know her right? The mother we just knew we were going to be? We had the perfect (lol) birth plan. The baby was going to be on a schedule. We were going to breastfeed (but our baby would know how to drink from a bottle). Night sleeping. No soother. No solids til 6 months. No juice. No sugar. Blah blah blah…
Well now that we are moms and we know that there is no such thing as perfect – it’s time to SPILL IT! Confessions! I asked several of my friends to confess something to me about parenting that they wouldn’t have told a soul at the time it happened.
I said I’d confess mine first. So here goes:
Cam was 18 months old. I was just weeks away from delivering Cuyler. Sean and I were watching a Leaf game on the couch. Cam was playing around with his ministicks. Sean went into the kitchen (probably to get more food for me) and I noticed Cam over by the end table. With his head back. Chugging Sean’s Corona. “CAM. NO! PUT IT DOWN!” I shouted as I tried to roll my whale-of-a-self off the couch. He put the bottle down and smiled at me. So I did what any good mom would do and I tore a strip off of Sean for being so careless.
Cam was 18 months old. I was just weeks away from delivering Cuyler. Sean and I were watching a Leaf game on the couch. Cam was playing around with his ministicks. Sean went into the kitchen (probably to get more food for me) and I noticed Cam over by the end table. With his head back. Chugging Sean’s Corona. “CAM. NO! PUT IT DOWN!” I shouted as I tried to roll my whale-of-a-self off the couch. He put the bottle down and smiled at me. So I did what any good mom would do and I tore a strip off of Sean for being so careless.
Cut to 4:30am that night. Cam is up with the dry heaves crying for water, which he chugs back. The next day he is lethargic. And sleepy and cranky. Hungover. At 18months.
*Here are a few that some friends were willing to share:
- When Josh was born I was in the hospital trying to sleep with him in the bassinette beside me. I lay in bed listening to this piercing cry, praying for the owner of the damn crying baby would pick it up so I could get some sleep, finally realizing that I was the owner of the damn baby.
- When Zack was about 3 days old, hubby had him on his chest sleeping on the couch. Both hubby and I woke up to find Zack on the floor beside the couch.
- When Micheal broke his leg we didn’t believe him…took him home, gave him dinner and even tried to get him to walk, using a cookie as bait. Three hours later we were in emerg only to find out it was broken and he has been in a cast ever since.
- I left Owen behind at a party a few months back. Got in the car, turned to hubby and said “Did we forget anything?” he looked at me like I had lost my mind and I noticed that the baby wasn’t in the car. He was inside the party, on a friends lap with 30+ people waiting for me to walk back in and get my baby.
This last one is my favourite:
Knowing that I’m a good parent, not a great parent – yet judging other parents for being idiots.
Knowing that I’m a good parent, not a great parent – yet judging other parents for being idiots.
It’s my favourite because it sums it all up. We all have a little bit of that in us – yet we are all the idiot parent at some point.
As long as we can look back on our mistakes, laugh at them and more importantly – LEARN from them then we will all be better for them. Especially our kids.
So now it’s YOUR turn! Your turn to share your Mom Moments!!
So get yourself over there and fess up!
*all names have been changed.
Hmmm, drinking babies seems to be the theme! At about 11 months, one of my twins decided she was going to have some of her uncles orange juice (sitting on the coffee table). We didn’t think anything of it, until she kept tipping over and just grinning. About a 1/2 hour later my brother asked where his vodka and orange juice went. Ooops, drunk baby! Thankfully, she slept it off!
I’ve left the baby behind before. It was at a huge event with lots of families mulling about. I was alone with my two girlies, while their dad was deployed overseas. I left with my oldest, for a few brief moments certain that I still only had one child, started driving away before I realized then raced back in to find her sleeping in her seat in a corner where I’d left her!
These are all great!! Thanks for sharing – I know it’s not easy sharing the not-so great moments!
Make sure to head over to Living Well and post them there as well – you could win FIVE THOUSAND bucks for posting your parenting gaffes!
I just want you all to know how wonderful it is to read other mom’s stories, it makes other moms like me feel like they are not alone and that others do the same thing as you. And omg I loved the leaving the baby story – I bet the people at the party had some great comments
Okay, here it is…I had my first-born on a mattress in the centre of the bed. she hadn’t even learned to rollover, yet, so I thought that was safe. Well, heard a thud, and a “WAH!” and well, that was the end of doing that!! Needless to say, never made that mistake with the second! You sure do live and learn.! 😀
When my little guy was not quite 2 years old, we went on a family trip to Disneyland. My eldest was 10 at the time, so we went on EVERY ride. I remember walking into the Haunted House against my better judgement with my little guy in my arms. We were standing in the middle of a gallery and the lights suddenly went off and we were in complete darkness. A teenage girl let out a loud, screeching scream to be silly and my young son practically LEAPT out of my arms — he was SO terrified. He was crying and shaking — I felt like the most HORRIBLE Mom on Earth for taking my baby into a scary, haunted house and traumatizing him! He is 4 years old now and hates the dark and loud noises to this day. I still feel SO bad about that… :o(
When my daughter was about 5 (she’s 11 now), I put her in the corner (not nose to the wall, but sitting facing out). I told her to, “sit there untill I tell you to come out”.
Two hours later my 15 year old came home from school and found her little sister sitting sadly, alone in the corner.
I FORGOT ALL about her. I’d put my four year old down for a nap and got caught up in work. I felt like a real SHIT.
However, time-out took on a whole new meaning for her. 😉
When our little guy was about 2, we had been staying at a hotel for a few weeks until our house was ready to move into. It was time to go do some laundry on the 1st floor so i put our toddler in his stroller and put the laundry basket on top of the stroller canopy as i had done many times before. I turned to lock the door and the stroller with toddler in tow lost it’s balance with the laundry basket being heavy (ok, ok, so i don’t do laundry every day and it added up, you got me! :p) So, here was all of my dirty laundry scattered on the hotel hallway and my lil guy laying down in the stroller on the floor!
We were on holiday in Florida, perusing the touristy stores along the pier, meandering in and out of little shops. My hubby and I were so impressed by how quiet and well behaved our little princess of 18 months old was. To our horror, once we sat down for an ice cream after we did some shopping for friends and family, we discovered that our little girl had also done some shopping of he won…she four fingered a lapful of goodies…plastic sippy cup, stuffed mickey mouse, snow globe and a tshirt. I suddenly realized why people were looking at us…I thought it was because we made such a lovely family…NOPE…we were accomplises to theft of a proportionate size. The funniest part is that she stashed everything behind her so we didn’t notice it until we sat down and took her out of the stroller. How terrible were we to not have been paying particular attention to our daughter. Tail between our legs, head down, we brought all the goodies back with big apologies….the kicker was, Nicole had decided that she wasn’t going to part with her sippy cup…we discovered it when we were leaving for the airport. We still have it and laugh at the story often since then!
When my eldest son was about 2 and I was expecting my daughter, my Mother and my Sister and I went to Port Stanley for a calm day at the beach. As I waddled to our “spot” off went my son straight into the water! The undertow flipped him under and shot him out into the water about 50 feet. As I sprinted out to rescue him a pompous *%# of a man was standing in the water looking at my angel, face up, but completely submerged. As I picked my son up the expetives that bellowed from my mouth toward the pompous *%# were enough to make your skin crawl. My Mother has never forgotten the power of hormones and a big belly!
I’m a yeller, never thought I would be but yes, I yell. loud. too often.
When 1st born was about 9 months old he used to wake up at 5am, full of energy & up for the day. I couldn’t stand those early mornings, I love, need, want my sleep. I would take him downstairs, turn on the TV, put up the gates (so he couldn’t escape), and fall asleep on the couch. It was all I could do to survive, although mow at 7 he’s a TV junkie & it’s probably all my fault.
My first week home with the girls. We decided to go out for a walk with our double decker stroller, carseats snap in like a double decker. I didn’t nap Fiona in (the smaller, more fragile baby – on FOUR pounds). Her seat tumbled over onto the frozen ground….I lamented. She was fine.
We’ve had a few beer/wine incidents as well.
Losing our temper.
Oh yeah, Fiona running off at Vancouver airport, all the way to the plane where there is a very large whole in the floor (which a fellow passenger kindly pointed out to me as I dragged Sophie along whilst chasing Fiona – YOU could stop her from falling through fellow passenger! Thanks for your help! No, I’m not bitter at all)
Oh Tracey – poor little Oliver!
That’s happened to me as well – once Cuyler puked in his crib and I didn’t know til the next morning. He slept in it all night. He had vomit-rash on his cheek 🙁
Hey Kerri! Thanks so much for reading AND for commenting. It’s cool to hear from people who read about my life and get such positive feedback – makes it all worthwhile!
Wow – twin baby boys?!? How fun is that?
And I loved that you referred to your oldest as “spirited”. I started using that term as well after I had been using “challenging” “busy” “nightmare” and “pain in the ass” for a few months. Spirited seemed so much nicer!
I will definitely let Sean know that you touched base! Thanks again!!
Oh, I was once ready to SMACK my kid for being a super-cling-on, whiney brat for the whole damned day, when he finally flung himself into my arms and my lips brushed his forehead by mistake… the child had a fever. I hadn’t noticed that he was unwell. Uchhh… I felt like a gigantic a-hole for the rest of the week, I’m sure. Yeah. So there’s that.
Hi Christine,
OMG I had to tell you that this blog is priceless. I have a few to share myself. I had decided that after my son was born 6 years ago we were not going to have any more children. Career driven, spirited child equals no more babies for me. That all changed when my son turned 4 years old and when we said sure we could do this again. Wham we got twins boys. You can just imagine some of the stories I can share and I will. The twins are 9 months now.
The last story you shared here is one that I know because I was one of the friends inside that house waiting for the mom to come back and grab her child. It was priceless.
Although we don’t know each other I have been reading your blog for some time now and I wanted you to know that in my chaos of 2 babies and a 6 year old that is extremely mentally draining, you bring laughter into my home. I LOVE IT.
I know your husband as well. Allow me to introduce myself. Hi, I am Kerri. Tell Sean that Kerri Van de Valk (now Kerri Reed) says hello. I first saw your blog through a post on Darren Hill’s wall on facebook.
Anyways I just wanted you to know that a complete stranger (to you) has been reading your blog and I LOVE IT. We all have chaos in our lives and you make me laugh which makes my days a little easier.
Have a GREAT DAY!!!!!
Kerri
Bwahaahahahaha! Love the broken leg one…we did something similar with our oldest daughter. “Suck it up” we said when she complained of a sore wrist. After not moving her arm, gingerly set on a pillow all night off the ER in the morning we go!
It was a dislocated elbow. EEP!