I am not an overly anxious person by nature and I like to think I keep a pretty level head even in stressful situations. I know that nothing can be solved by worrying so I try to find peace in that when there are things that weigh heavily on my mind.
However, I have been battling more anxious thoughts than usual since our last baby has been born. It stems from this deep feeling of “our family is exactly as we want it right now” and the fear that something awful could happen to change that. I am more paranoid about SIDS, and the upcoming flu season, and countless other things that fall into the Best Not To Think About It category. I try not to dwell on these fears and just go on living my life since, really, what else is there to do? I even feel a little anxious just writing about this, for fear it will summon Fate and something horrible will happen and everyone will look back on this very post and say, “How ironic, the day she wrote about her fear of bad things happening, a piano fell from a third storey building and landed on her head!”
I don’t feel consumed by the anxiety, nor is it affecting my ability to cope, so I don’t think I need medication or anything, but it’s just interesting for me to observe the subtle change in my heart and mind.
Maybe I’m just getting older and wiser and realizing that there are no guarantees in this life, yet there is so damn much to lose.
I had post partum anxiety disorder…and suffered from so much anxiety in the past. I do think a level of it is normal…but remembering that some things are out of our control (Christine…was it you and I just talking about this??). What I mean is I try not to dwell on what could happen becasue it wrecks the ‘right now’…..
My anxiety is at a high these days. I feel like it gets worse as I get older.
For all the same reasons as you listed.
I thought that maybe it was everything we’ve been through with the kids and I’m sure that’s part of it, but many of my friends have shared that they worry more as they get older as well. I guess it’s just another part of “growing up”!