Ahh, sometimes I miss my smug married life.
I’d been married for 11 years, to the person I thought was my very best friend. We had similar interests, we laughed together, worked as a team, and had grand plans for our mutual futures. I could never understand how people were sideswiped by divorce until I was. I mean, really, how do you miss the signs that your partner is at the end of their rope? How can you seriously not hear the warning bells? We would talk about the state of friends’ marriages, and gloat about how our own was bulletproof.
Except it wasn’t.
Time wears on a couple. Through financial strain, having children, losing babies, job stress, family tension… eventually, even the best relationships start to fray around the edges. I always thought we did it all “right”. We dated for many years, we talked about our hopes and dreams, we based a romantic relationship on a friendship, and we didn’t fight much at all—but I suppose we never really did the regular maintenance that a long-term relationship needs to survive.
Thinking back, I wonder where we diverged—what went wrong? Or maybe it was never really right? I don’t know what constitutes a solid relationship, really. I’ve never been head over heels in love, I’ve never been lost for breath without a partner, and I wonder if my standoffishness had anything to do with the demise of my marriage.
One day it was just . . . over.
Of course, that’s simplifying things, but the truth is, I never saw the end coming. There were no regular fights, no hostility, no resentment I didn’t see as surmountable. I thought every marriage had ups and downs, and that the slumps we experienced would pass. I never expected anything to be irreparable, and I never expected to be facing divorce at 42. But here I am. I could spend forever trying to figure it all out, but if 11 months hasn’t given me any answers, I doubt it’s worth pondering indefinitely. The reality is that sometimes things are too broken to fix, and moving forward is the only way through.
I’m no expert obviously (hahahahaha), but I know that I’d never do things the same again. I can see where I lost myself, I can see that my life had lost its shine, but I can also see that I was resigned to the idea that that’s just how life is at this stage—having young kids is trying on anyone, right?
I may not know how to prevent this kind of relationship end, but I sure know what to do once it’s happened. When my partner told me he was leaving, my first reactions were all ones borne of deep emotion. Crying, pleading, scrambling to hold us together—too little too late. I went to counselling and was given permission to do something I hadn’t done in decades: focus on myself. I’m going to tell you that if you’re facing divorce, things will be okay. It may not feel that way right now, but if you take some healthy first steps, you’ll soon be on the road to happiness again.
Here are some helpful first steps for anyone who’s been sideswiped by divorce:
• Take a deep breath
Don’t react until you’ve had time to think. I know, it’s almost impossible when the rug has been yanked out from under you. But here’s the thing—if you really think about it, there have to be underlying problems in a relationship for any party to want out that badly. Really sit with yourself and think about your own happiness, and nothing else. If you have young children, you’ll have to be strong for them, and acting from a place of logic rather than heated emotions will help.
• Separate Finances Immediately
Open your own bank account, and discuss finalizing financial disclosure documents. I wish we’d done this immediately, but it’s so difficult to see through the emotions to get down to the business part of a separation, that this is something that often slides. But the sooner you have a clear financial picture, the sooner you can breathe, and see that you’re going to be fine. But take note: your finances are 50/50 until your separation agreement is finalized, so if you think revenge spending is a good idea, think again.
• Seek counselling
This was key to my survival. I poured my heart out to a kind counsellor who had zero real answers for me, but a ton of support. Nobody can tell you what you should do, or why this happened because nobody has lived your life, but a good counsellor or therapist can give you the tools needed to work on yourself and emerge from the ashes whole again.
• Learn about the process
This one was scary for me—the mere word “divorce” made my heart pound, and I felt nauseous. But the more I researched, the more empowered I felt. Knowing your rights makes you feel less abandoned or hopeless. Financial insecurity must be the biggest worry in this process, so find out what your options are, and how you can both get to the end without unnecessary fighting. I was in the dark with regards to many household finances, but seeing everything on paper made things seem daunting, challenging, but manageable.
• Lean on good friends
I’ve learned that there is no end to the “friends” who are ready to slam your spouse for their “selfish” decision to divorce. There are people who’ll forget we may have played a part in our marital demise, and much like any other crutch, this kind of support feels good but doesn’t heal us. We need the friends who will listen and support, hold us together, and it’s even better (sadly) if they’ve walked this path. Reach out to support groups (like this amazing one on Facebook) for info on how to get through things, and how to co-parent effectively.
Being sideswiped by divorce is one of the most challenging things I’ve had to wade through, and I’m not saying it’s smooth sailing now, but I haven’t cried in months.
And that’s progress.
NICHOLAS OWINO says
My confidence in Crypto transactions was fully restored after my encounter with Space Spy Recovery when they helped recover my crypto investment of 525,000 USD. I thought I had completely lost it when it vanished into thin air right from my wallet with no transaction history! But with the useful assistance of Space Spy Recovery, I got my money back. Put your message across: addresses: soacespy@hackermail.com. WhatsApp: +1 (657) 543-6038
Mathew monroe says
The lack of clear and correct information on these media platforms is disheartening. I have been misled on here, which cost me more money as I sought help for my scammed funds. I have worked with 4 hackers so far but to no avail. Mind you, it’s usually super shameful coming to terms with being frauded. It’s neither easy to share such information with your loved ones. It just becomes like a hidden bad wound. On my final shot of help-seeking, I met DECODE HACKERS who started working on my case immediately. So imagine my surprise when all was recovered in 14 hours. Honestly, am baffled till date. They are my hero till date. So, anyone in need of some help like I did, in CRYPTOCURRENCY, FUNDS, or INVESTMENTS, seek these people out, you might be the next testimony you know.
Email: decodehackers(AT)gmail(DOT)com Telegram: (PLUS)1 (917) 384‑3379
Rita C. Taylor says
HOW TO RECOVER SCAMMED BITCOIN/FUNDS
My heart was shattered into a million pieces when I discovered that the person I thought I had fallen deeply in love with was a fake. A celebrity impersonator who manipulated my emotions and swindled me out of $200,000 in Bitcoin. I felt like I was living in a nightmare, unable to wake up from the pain and betrayal. BUT, thanks to the angels at jetwebhackers, I was able to recover my money and bring the scammer to justice. Their expertise and support gave me the strength to heal and move forward. If you’re going through something similar, please know that you’re not alone. Don’t give up hope – there are good people who can help you. #scamvictim #heartbroken #bitcoinrecovery #justice
CONTACT: JETWEBHACKERS, on their
EMAIL:jetwebhackers@gmail.com
TELEGRAM: @jetwebhackers
Philip MANSSON says
Hello everyone, I’ve always liked the notion of investing in cryptocurrencies, but I didn’t follow the correct procedures, and I ended up losing all of my money to a phony site that made fraudulent bitcoin investments. I was duped out of my hard-earned money after falling for a bitcoin investment scam because I didn’t conduct enough due diligence. I tried everything to get my money back, but I was unable to do so. I also called the authorities, but they were unable to assist me until I learned about THE LION CYBER SECURITY COMPANY, a cryptocurrency recovery company that has assisted other victims of scams in getting their money back. I got in touch with them right away and gave them all the information they required to support their inquiry. The Lion Cyber Security Company was able to locate those con artists and retrieve my cryptocurrency funds. I sincerely appreciate their dependable and competent assistance. The most effective method for getting your cryptocurrency and locked funds back is by reaching out to them through the following
Email: ( lioncyberrr@gmail. com)
Whatsapp; (+1 (929) 660-4485)
Richardson Angie says
I lost $103,450 with a fake crypto investor. I am Richardson and here is my story. Of course, they advise us to do a good background check before deciding where and when to invest. But they entirely forget that the scammers have a “clean” background record. So you will find all the good reviews and ads about them when you research. Mine was no different. They looked legit and I made my deposits plus other more deposits when chasing my withdrawals. I reached my limits and knew I had to get my money back no matter what. I did some deep searching and finally decided to try out The Exner Hacker at TheexnerhackerATprotonmailDOTcom. Guess who had their total investment in approximately 20 hours. Good thing about this hacker is that they only require the transaction information and hackers address and everything else is on them until the money is fully back. Reach them on their email or Telegram number : (PLUS)1 (917) 384‑3379 to get the help you need with finances and crypto.
Betty Donna says
LEEULTIMATEHACKER@ AOL. COM
Support @ leeultimatehacker .com
telegram:LEEULTIMATE
wh@tsapp +1 (715) 314 – 9248
https://leeultimatehacker.com
My name is Betty, and I reside in the USA. Just a few weeks ago, I found myself ensnared in a devastating scam involving a fraudulent cryptocurrency investment scheme. The ordeal began innocuously enough when I encountered what appeared to be a legitimate investment opportunity through a woman who had illicitly accessed a close friend’s Facebook account. Seduced by promises of substantial returns, I initially invested a modest sum and, to my delight, saw impressive profits. As my confidence grew, so did the deception. I was gradually persuaded to upgrade to royal VIP status within the platform, believing it would unlock even greater financial gains. Unfortunately, this decision proved to be my undoing. Instead of seeing increased returns or easy withdrawal of funds, I found myself trapped in a cycle of demands for additional investments and promises of delayed profits that never materialized. The situation quickly spiraled out of control, culminating in me investing nearly $1.5 million into what turned out to be a sophisticated scam. Every attempt to withdraw my funds or seek clarification from the platform’s support team was met with stonewalling tactics and excuses. It soon became clear that I had been manipulated and deceived out of a substantial portion of my savings. Devastated and feeling utterly betrayed, I embarked on a desperate search for a solution. It was during this desperate period that I discovered Lee Ultimate Hacker, a renowned agency specializing in Hacking and Digital Assets Recovery. Drawn by their reputation and a glimmer of hope, I reached out to them with my harrowing tale of financial loss and deception. Lee Ultimate Hacker displayed an unparalleled level of professionalism and empathy. They understood the gravity of my situation and wasted no time in deploying their expertise to assist me. Unlike my previous encounters with fraudulent platforms, Lee Ultimate Hacker operated with transparency and integrity. They meticulously reviewed the details of my case, providing clear explanations of their recovery process and patiently answering my myriad of questions. Lee Ultimate Hacker’s approach was both meticulous and strategic. Leveraging advanced technological tools and their extensive knowledge of digital forensics, they embarked on a methodical journey to trace and recover my misappropriated funds. Throughout the process, they maintained open lines of communication, providing regular updates and reassurance that progress was being made. The relief I felt when Lee Ultimate Hacker successfully facilitated the withdrawal of my profits and investments cannot be overstated. It was a profound moment of reclaiming control and restoring my peace of mind after weeks of turmoil and uncertainty. Their dedication and determination to right the wrongs inflicted by financial fraud restored my faith in justice and ethical recovery practices.I am deeply grateful to Lee Ultimate Hacker for their unwavering support and effective intervention. They not only recovered a significant portion of my lost funds but also provided invaluable guidance and emotional support throughout the recovery process. Their commitment to client satisfaction and ethical standards sets them apart as a trusted ally for anyone grappling with the aftermath of financial deception Lee Ultimate Hacker serves as a testament to the power of perseverance and the importance of seeking reputable assistance in times of crisis. To anyone who finds themselves victimized by financial scams or fraudulent schemes, I wholeheartedly recommend Lee Ultimate Hacker. They are more than just experts in digital recovery; they are compassionate advocates dedicated to helping individuals like me reclaim their financial security and rebuild their lives. With Lee Ultimate Hacker by your side, recovery is a reality.
Amelia says
HOW CAN I EASILY RESTORED MY STOLEN FUNDS
WHICH RECOVERY HACKER IS THE BEST AND RELIABLE??
HIRE OPTIMISTIC HACKER GAIUS / AN AUTHORIZED HACKER FOR CRYPTO RECOVERY.
Are you having trouble logging into your bitcoin wallet? I heartily suggest OPTIMISTIC HACKER GAIUS if you find yourself in the sad circumstance of losing access to your Bitcoin wallet and require professional assistance for recovery. Once, I saw an advertisement on Instagram for a cryptocurrency investment platform, and I fell for it. I lost almost $908,000 to this fraudulent website. I came upon OPTIMISTIC HACKER GAIUS on Quora. I emailed them all the information I had and spoke with them right away since I felt like I had a chance. My money was refunded in less than 72 hours, and the Details about the con artists were made public. Since I believed I would never get my money back from those phony internet investment criminals, I’m really happy I found them early. You can reach them at
WhatsApp at +1..6..0..1..4..6..0..9..4..7..7.
email… optimistichackergaius @ seznam.cz
website: https://optimistichackegaius.com
Mark Heltor says
Many fake crypto trading platforms have successfully managed to con victims of their hard-earned money. A few weeks ago, I was contacted by a crypto trader on Instagram who claimed to be a manager on a trading platform, he convinced me to invest my money into crypto mining hoping to make huge profits from it, I was convinced when I saw my account balance on their platform, but when I wanted to withdraw my earnings, they kept requesting for money for tax and other unnecessary fees. I realized then that I was being catfished, I stopped all communication and went to the internet to do my research about crypto when I came across Firmwall Cyber Security Service, a well reliable crypto recovery company, I was very pleased with the reviews I saw about this crypto recovery company and I contacted them to assist me to recover my crypto, I gave them all the information and within a few hours, Firmwall Cyber Security was able to recover my crypto assets. I’m truly grateful for their service and I highly recommend them
E-mail = Firmwallcyber@techie. com
Web = https://firmwallcyber.wixsite.com/firmwall
Whats App = + 1 937 542 0667
jacobnewton says
ETHICAL HACKER FOR HIRE
This narrative is by far the most life-changing event I have ever encountered. I’m the kind of man who has an open heart and believes in the natural world. The pay at my new work was more than sufficient for me, but I also made the decision to invest in bitcoin so that I could save money and access it whenever I wanted without having to visit the bank. I went to Telegram and, without realising it, signed up with a fraudulent investment firm. I sent the company a sizable portion of my savings—roughly €840,000. I was requested to open two more bitcoin accounts, one for each month that I will get my profits into. After four months of waiting, nothing has appeared.
Every day, all I see is my bitcoin growing, but I can’t access it. After telling a friend about it, she suggested that I contact Captain Jack Crypto. I wrote to him to explain how I had been duped on Telegram. He succeeded in getting back to me all of the money I had lost, all without the scammers’ knowing. Again, I want to thank you for your excellent service. This is undoubtedly excellent help, and I will spread the word about your evaluation to everyone. I’ve never received better internet service than this.
Email: Captainjackcrypto@europe.com is his email.
CATHERINE EDWARD says
THE REAL CRYPTO/BITCOIN RECOVERY AGENT
I was scammed over ( $98,900) by someone I met online on a fake investment project. I started searching for help legally to recover my money and I came across a lot of Testimonies about ETHICREFINANCE Recovery Expects. I contacted them providing the necessary information’s and it took the experts about 27hours to locate and help recover my stolen funds. I am so relieved and the best part was, the scammer was located and arrested by local authorities in his region. I hope this help as many out there who are victims and have lost to these fake online investment scammers. I strongly recommend their professional services for assistance with swift and efficient recovery. They can reached through the link below.
Email Address: ethicsrefinance@gmail.com
WHATSAPP :+1 (719) 642-8467
Finely Louie says
Don’t be fooled by the wily tricks of scammers lurking in the crypto realm! Stay vigilant and educate yourself about common Bitcoin scams, such as fake giveaways, pyramid schemes, and phishing attempts. If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is! Trust your instincts and never share your private information or send Bitcoin to unknown individuals. After all, even wizards can’t undo a foolish mistake! As the realm of cryptocurrencies continues to expand, so does the need for robust security measures and reliable recovery services.
www . prowizardgilbertrecovery . xyz impressive track record in successfully recovering lost Bitcoin distinguishes them as a trusted and proficient player in the field. I lost a huge amount having tried to invest with the wrong platform. I worked with a couple of recovery agents to help me get back my funds but I kept on losing more money that I got no positive result from. Through recommendation having looked everywhere, I got to connect with Pro Wizard Gilbert Recovery which is a team of tech experts in bitcoin. I discussed my entire condition to them and they hit the ground running. To my greatest belief, Pro Wizard Gilbert Recovery has been able to recover my lost amount. They really and truly have the idea, experience, and tools people who they have worked for always say. I am glad I came in contact with Pro Wizard Gilbert Recovery after I have lost so much. I am sincerely grateful. Reach out to Pro Wizard Gilbert Recovery to help you so you don’t lose your hard earned income.
Email: prowizardgilbertrecovery(@)engineer.com WhatsApp: +1 (361) 418‑1326
Gabriel DeRobertis says
My name is Gabriel DeRobertis; I’m a waiter here in Norcross Georgia. I went through a messy divorce which left my credit bleeding. My wife was giving custody of our daughter and I was told to pay for child support monthly. With my credit ruined and my low income, paying for child support was like a huge weight on me. I applied for a loan several times and all was declined due to my poor credit score. I met Angela, a customer who noticed I was always moody. She approached me, we talked and she offered to help me. She introduced me to a credit guru (760Plus Credit Score). She assured me that my problems would be solved by them. I made some commitments and within 11days of contacting them, my credit score was boosted to 772 and every negative item had been removed. I was told to recommend their services. I contacted them via 760PLUSCREDITSCORE@GMAIL.COM. Please do well to mention me
Adams Good says
Hello here, i’ll like to share my experience with ( REMOTESPYTECH (@) GMAILCOM) i had serious issues after i got back from Asia on a business trip, my friends at home were looking worried for me like my wife had been doing some stuff while i was away and they felt like we was done, of course i didnt believe everything they said and i’m not the type to confront anybody so i didnt, i read about (Remotespytech @ gmailcom) online and i contacted him, before i travelled back for work i found out alot and it really hurt me, she still doesnt know i can read her whatsapp conversation and text messages and once i confront her and she tells a lie, i will have more than enough evidence. What a great service, you can WhatsApp him at { +56 9 3129 3092 }…
Email: REMOTESPYTECH (@) GMAILCOM
Sophia witney says
I have been with a cheating spouse before and trust me I know how it feels, those suspicions are not mere paranoia. If you suspect that he is cheating, he might actually be..I hired a PI who helped me install monitoring bugs on his phone that diverted all his messages( facebook, whatsapp, text messages, and even phone calls) to my phone; (invisiblespyloop@gmail.com ) is the man for the job with a very high level of professionalism and highly reliable. I really enjoyed working with him and the few friends I told have been nothing but thankful to me for the referral. Drop him a text or whatsapp on (517) 234-3214. Lastly, you can also reach him if your funds in hang in online trading platform like expert-option ,cal financial, Analyst , coinspot, Ctxprime and many more
Natasha says
[…]I am so happy and words can’t really express my joy. I was referred to Dr Mack by a co-staff when i found that my lover was having an affair with someone else, his attitude changed from being the caring type he has been to not been caring, Dr Mack turned my relationship around instantly, he restored my relationship, he can help you with spiritual readings and physical readings we all needs what best in life so make your dreams come true with the help of Dr Mack, contact him for any relationship or marriage issues. I guarantee you that he will help his dr_mack@ yahoo .com••••••••••••?!!!!!!!!!!! […]
Innovative Counselling says
The best gift you can give to a newly engaged couple-send them to marriage counselling. Some Churches make this mandatory. All of the above mentioned can help to learn what your partner is expecting, your expectations, how to handle important issues, if you are compatible or if the marriage is not ideal.
SLS says
Thanks for this. I was side-swiped too … after 25 years together. I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world, that we were meant to be together. We laughed every day. I felt like a fool after he made his announcement that he was “divorcing me”. How could I have been so blind?. In retrospect, his mid life crisis had been happening for a few years . It’s been 2.5 years and it is still hard … I think back about what I could have done differently, even though that is not productive. Unfortunately, it has not been amicable at all .. once he made his decision, he also decided to try to destroy me and he has made every single step terrible.
Leonore says
I’m so sorry. It’s so hard, and never feels fair.
Jill says
Thank you. I needed to read that.