There are times in my life, when I am desperately running for a bus that slowly peels away, or when my keys fumble out of my hand and fall behind the radiator, that I think I am simply unlucky. For about five steaming minutes I wallow in this pointless exercise of thought, believing for a sad sackian moment that life simply dealt me a bad hand.
Pathetic I know. But it also works the other way. When we arrived back from our year away, Steph was six months pregnant, Hudson was approaching four years old. Thankfully we secured a rental house online from abroad (thanks Internet! Thanks dad!) and Steph did some preemptive marketing and managed to secure work almost immediately upon the wheels touching down. Me? I was not so fortunate, and besides, someone needed to hang around with Hud to eat ice cream and catch bugs in jars.
After Tasman was born, Steph was offered a pretty solid job and low and behold, after pounding the pavement for a couple of months, I landed full time employment as well. Score! We both had jobs! Hey wait, we have a four year old and a three month old.
Enter Rebecca.
Barely five feet tall, barely 100 lbs, this little whisper of a woman with a smile as big as a house, stormed into our lives and basically took over. A former montessori teacher in her native Philippines, she came to us through the Live-In Caregiver Program and found a home in a very large room in our very small house.
Almost five years later, she is still with us, arranging play dates, ensuring homework gets started, making rice every once in awhile and keeping our household in total order. Most importantly, she has blanketed our boys with another layer of love and for this, we are supremely grateful.
She has also become our friend. She no longer lives with us as she was married a couple of years ago to a great guy and they bought a condo together. They both spend holiday dinners with us as well as all birthday celebrations, both ours and the boys. The relationship evolved over the years to a place of trust, confidence and warmth.
Rebecca’s tenure as our caregiver ends this June as full time employment is no longer required for Hudson and Tasman. As school ends, various camps start and come September, only after school care is needed (oh crap, we should get on that) and Rebecca, who recently found out her teacher experience is transferable, will be seeking a different job, a different life.
The boys will feel the change. Tasman knows no other kind of life than the one with Rebecca in it. When she had to travel home for a month to take care of a family matter, Tasman was heartbroken and would have earnest pangs of sadness for his friend Rebecca.
Buddies
So maybe I am lucky. We hear about the trials other families have with consistent child care, whether caregiver or daycare, it’s part of life for two parents who work. Having someone so diligent (no sick days in five years), so loving (she makes beautiful crafts for the boy’s birthdays) so freaking awesome on a day-to-day basis makes me think we are indeed blessed.
She will leave our employ, but she will never leave us. We won’t let her. We will see still her and she will want to witness the rapid growth of the boys, of her boys, of our boys.
How do you manage child care? Any similar success stories or contrasting horror tales?
She sounds like a dream… how lucky you are, indeed! But, she sounds lucky to have you, too. That’s terrific!
You guys are lucky indeed. We have had two amazing nannys for our girls, and when our second had to go back to St.Vincent, we were all heartbroken. Charmaine’s departure was pretty much the catalyst that began our huge transition from city to cornfield. I just couldn’t imagine anybody else, besides me, watching our girls. Not because I don’t believe in childcare (I do), but because I just didn’t think we could get that attached to somebody else again.
I always wonder why the detractors to outside care think that way – as far as I’m concerned, the love that my girls had/felt for their caregivers was a benefit to all of us.
Knowing you and Steph, you receive what you give. Sounds like it was a great fit all around, you welcomed her with open arms and allowed her to bring all her special gifts and love to your family and it all just flowed all around. Lovely story.
Your boys are SOO lucky! She sounds like a dream for any parent!
My Missy is in a wonderful daycare and she is flourishing there. She has been there since she was 5 months old as I was offered a job I couldn’t pass up (& am SOO glad I didn’t – I really LIKE it – not many people can say that). She is smart as a whip and loves her teachers, I think when the time come to move on (in a couple of years) it is truly going to be hard for both of us. They have become our extended family.