Most of the time on here I talk about Will. Our ups and downs. The ridiculous (did I tell you he ‘hellllooo’ed’ me last week?) and the sweet. Sometimes I talk about my family, or my mom, or the things I’m grateful for. Or my fave, people who really piss me off.
It also feels like once a year, I rant about my singleness. I think it’s that time of year. Friday I got into a big funk about it. I can attribute that to two things.
a. Because of the need for the godforsaken penguins, I now get a plethora of magazines. Last week they were stacking up so I plowed through them. So many articles written by women about their unsuccessful relationships, their unhappiness, their breakups…and then the miraculous awesome relationship that they found…you know…a month later.
b. I went to a party Friday night and when we were planning it, I had just been on a couple of successful dates with a great guy. I thought, ‘hmmm might I actually not have to go to a party single for once?’ Well the timing was bad, it didn’t happen and yes, I went to the party single again.
So I had a small pity party, drank amazing champagne cocktails and questioned my friends about how so many people seem to exit one relationship and immediately find someone else to try it out with when I can’t find anyone willing to take that gamble over here.
My single friend Julie came up with an awesome theory that she called ‘The Bad Job Analogy’. Essentially if you’re in a crappy job all you can think about it getting out, so any new job that comes around looks good. They’ll jump into a new relationship to cover the pain or failure of the last one and to not be alone. Then she added, ‘That or they have a relationship gene that I’m clearly missing.’ I’m missing it too apparently.
I like this theory. It also brings out some of my shortcomings. I’m probably too comfortable in my being single (and my job). I know how to do it really well. But I do feel like I’m ready. This last guy? I didn’t give him a nickname…my girlfriends will tell you that is major progress. My tarot cards hinted that change was coming. Maybe things are aligning for my 44th year.
The pity party is over. It was a quick one this year. BUT. I am still baffled by the ‘one relationship to the next’ people. Do you agree with Julie’s theory? Do you have one of your own? I’m wondering if they have a line on where the hell to meet people that I don’t know about!
Who knows? Maybe I should just stop reading women’s magazines and switch to Maxim or something. I wonder how many penguins you get for that.
You know what is crazy LG and others…it’s not even women’s mags per se (although I think I alluded to that). The article that sent me over the edge was in Toronto Life…Leah MacLaren’s Messy Divorce… UGH. It’s online!
As per the infamous ‘Sunscreen Song’, don’t read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
(Feel free to not take the newspaper-article-faux-valedictorian address-turned-Baz Luhrmann-song advice to heart. I still love a good Glamour mag in life.)
Women’s mags are a bunch of fantasy meant to sell ads and play on one’s insecurities so you buy more products. Ignore them.
Many people are afraid to be alone and have lower standards so it’s easier for them to jump from one thing to another. Their feelings can’t be so deep if they can move on so easily. You said yourself you’re good at being alone. So you’re not willing to settle for any warm body just to say you have someone. Ignore those people too.
Finding someone good who will treat you (and Will) right may take time. But it will be worth it. You’ll be ready. And you’ll be sure NOT to ignore HIM. 🙂
never read women’s mags
never
ever
I have no theories but I like your friend’s and I think it has a lot of truth to it. There are many filler people but you should not settle- sorry if that sounds cliche.xx
I TOTALLY blame this whole scenario on the chainmails you didn’t forward. Seeeeee??!