It started last year, my eldest daughter questioning where babies come from. Caught off guard, I mentioned something about “a special hug between a mommy and daddy” then changed the subject. It satisfied her curiosity at the time, but recently her questions resurfaced and we felt the time had come to tell her the truth.
I was hesitant because while I didn’t want her to learn about sex by hearing some raunchy kids talk about it on the school playground, I also didn’t want to prematurely boot her of the land of childhood innocence.
Upon the recommendation of a few good friends, we checked out the book “It’s Not the Stork” and this past weekend I climbed on the couch with all three girls and we read it together, talking about it the whole time.
They had questions, and I answered them frankly. All in all, it took about 20 minutes and they haven’t dwelled on it too much. I found the book to be very age-appropriate and it sparked conversation without embarrassment.
I feel SO much better, knowing that we have taken the first step to educate our kids in an appropriate way about sex and where babies come from. I want our home to be one where there can be a safe and open dialogue about sex, where we can help our kids form a healthy view of it. This feels like a great first step in that direction.
How did you approach “The Talk” with your kids? Did you tell them about the birds and the bees proactively, or did you have to respond after they got socked with the truth from older kids? What age did you find was best to talk about it?
Hmmm. I’m going to pick this one up. Will asked me the other day how he came out of me… I said ‘ummm I pushed really hard’… god…so much more to come…
My conversation with my son went well overall. Just a few “embarrassing” questions. However, I just about died when at the end of our chat he looked at me with a flicker of recognition and said, “Um. So. Did Daddy do that to you?” I wanted the floor to swallow me up!
I vividly remember my daughter being in grade one and asking, “yes but Mommy: how does the sperm get to the egg?”
When I told her, she literally (yes, literally) jumped out of her seat and said, “that is SOOO gross!”
I plan to tell that story at her wedding 😉
Sounds like you did great! When my eldest asked I explained the basics, and her response was, ” I get the whole egg and sperm thing to make a baby, but mommy, WHY would anyone want to do that?”. Busted. My child was the first in her class to hear that sex was fun.
Not at that stage yet, but I’m subscribing to these comments! Great post Amanda! You’re raising your girls in such an admirable way!
Amanda – I had the talk with my eldest. A very pragmatic, sex for procreation type discussion.
I laid out the basics and let him ask a couple of questions before he wanted to drop it.
He has subsequently asked a few more questions, each more rich than the first, and I try to answer as honestly as I can.
The best part was when I finished my initial explanation. He looked at me, queered his eyes and said:
“That is half really gross and half really interesting.”
Great post.
J.