Once upon a time there was a little girl who couldn’t say sorry. She was a wonderful little girl with an amazing imagination, a gift for athletics and a beaming smile and a joy for life her parents adored. She was a quirky little girl who many could not figure out and she was often misunderstood. But she never meant harm, her weakness was caused by a curse passed to her from generations before her, it lived as a dark feeling of insecurity deep within herself.
Many would never know that this little girl struggled. She was beautiful and bright and talented. But she did. Her parents could tell her a million times in a million different ways how much they loved and admired her but what she often heard was that she was not worthy. Her expectations were for perfection and nothing less.
At times, her parents tired of picking their battles, felt she should apologize or take responsibility for something she had said or done. Her older brother did this with little effort. He understood that sometimes it is important to back down and other times it is important to listen to your parents and show respect. But her brother’s actions just enraged the little girl and made her more defensive and stubborn. She would dig her heels in and prepare for a fight.
Sometimes her stubborn Mommy or her frustrated Daddy would take her on. She was fierce in battle, never relenting, always getting the upper hand. Even when her Mommy walked away or threatened consequences she would hold strong.
And once the battle was nearing an end and both the girl and her Mommy or Daddy were wounded and tired she would breakdown and cry. In her last battle with her Mommy they held on tight to each other and her Mommy whispered into her ear, “I love you. Always. You are the best girl in the world. I am sorry.”
But the girl didn’t believe it. The girl was so sad and felt so terrible that through her tears she said to her Mommy, “I hate myself. Why am I like this?” and her Mommy said, “Why do you feel this way?” And the girl said back, “Because I should have just said sorry the first time. I don’t want to be like this.”
And now the Mommy is so sad too. She can’t sleep. She feels terrible and is so worried about her little girl. Her girl is SO strong and SO amazing but the Mommy knows that not everyone will see this or take the time to look a little closer. The Mommy knows that the girl’s stubborness and insecurity are going to get in her way but she doesn’t know how to help her.
So, the Mommy is turning to you, wise readers of this blog and mothers of the internet, to help. Do you know of another little girl like this one? What can the Mommy do to help?