Who gets to decide what is enough and what is too much? I am concerned that all of the “expert” advice may impact our ability to make
decisions based on what is right for our families. What do you think? Listen the latest Mom’s The Word video podcast and share your thoughts in the comments below.
I agree with Therese that the gauge should be the children’s happiness, and I also feel it’s important to expose them to a wide variety of choices…music, dance and the arts as well as sports. But I also think there is a danger in our world of activities, activities, activities. In today’s culture, parents often don’t like to be authoritarian, but we ARE the parents and they ARE children and sometimes we have to say “no”, even if our children want to join something, and for a variety of reasons.
I recently said no to Karate. Because I felt it cost too much and because it was going to be “too much” for our family – it would mean something EVERY day of the week, and for my oldest, she would have to go straight from piano to Karate, with only 30 minutes for dinner in the van in between. Plus, I am alone in the evenings because my hubby works then, and I knew I was going to be stressed by the race to get them fed, changed and to Karate on time.
I also feel for my younger child, who has been dragged around to Brownies and piano lessons for two years now, without being able to take part herself. I made a very concerted effort this year to keep their activities balanced. Both are in dance, both in Guiding and both in skiing. Once the little one can read, she will be able to take piano too, if she wants. Now I know how my sisters felt when they got dragged to all my soccer games!
I agree that each family is different in the amount of activities their children can be involved in. I think it is important to expose children to different types of activities (sports, music, Guiding and Scouting figure prominently in our house) and find something they love. Their happiness should be the gauge. My teenage daughter decided to drop horseback riding lessons and when I asked why, she said “I really like it, but I don’t love it.” I selfishly applauded her decision thinking “YES! One less thing on the calendar!” until her next breath – “Can I take guitar lessons instead?” So far, she loves them.