So when first child came along – she was so easy, so angelic- I thought WOW I am a great mom
And just like you should never say ” I never get sick” or “I never get speeding tickets” because
WHAM
you get hit with both
I must have said WOW I am a great mom too many times because then I got Tasmanian devil
Tasmanian devil was daughter #2 who could barely stand being slower or not the best at everything. This made being the youngest and being a toddler and preschooler very hard for her.
When her sister and all her friends would run down the street she would throw herself to the ground and scream- she could not bear to be last. And at 18 months she knew she would be.
She had daily EPIC tantrums out of sheer frustration.
They almost took me apart.
Epic tantrums announce to the world (who does not understand this) “Wow – she is a lousy mom”
I was the one at the grocery store with the kid throwing eggs out of the shopping cart. One by one. (can’t totally blame her- it must have felt great) I was the one on your front lawn tackling her to the ground because she was so mad we were leaving the park. I was the one with the daughter with knots in her hair because brushing her hair made her crazy.
I was the one at the “preschool interview”- at the time it all seemed very important and now it sounds hysterical-I grabbed a lollypop before heading to it thinking I might burst into tears at the quiet discussion of my wild preschooler. You know, sucking on that lolly would soothe me the way cigs used to. Apparently it is not good to smoke at preschool interviews.
Head of the preschool says to me ” You have quite a daughter” And I am thinking- she is driving you crazy too? I am now sucking wildly on the lollypop and fighting back the tears. “We call her the second teacher around here. She organizes and soothes everyone. She is a natural leader”
What?
So one is an angel at home and cries at school and the other is a devil at home and brilliant at school.
Oh boy I have a lot to learn. I bit hard through the lollypop in shock.
Number two has taught me so much. She taught me that strength/stubborness is a virtue. She taught me that what works in one situation does not work in all situations. She taught me about intensity and negotiation. Her soulfullness and wisdom gave me my present career. She showed me how to be better. She taught me to be more patient. She taught me to dig deep within myself. Her quiet intelligence astounds me. Her sass thrills me. Mostly.
Her strength and intensity has served her and continues to serve her very well.
I am totally crazy about her.
And crazy about having a family with two very different children.
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xoxox Erin- I miss you! I will be fascinated to hear how your two are different in spite of the twin status
and you too, Barbie!
You certainly have two gems and thanks for sharing as it is so true how individual our kids are and how they keep us on our toes!
This is so beautiful Nancy – as were your letters to your daughter. Love.
That’s the best… xox