I catch it out of the corner of my eye and I cannot quite believe it. It brings melancholy and some anxiety. But it is unmistakeable and there it is.
It winks at me and I try to avoid its steely glare but there it is
that first leaf of Fall
and it is only the beginning of August.
There are two of me like that old storybook, the city mouse and the country mouse. The city mouse is always in a hurry, always dressed up, always so task oriented. Armed with a list and no time to talk. All year long I say to myself-“in the summer we will have time to…”
I love the flip flops and the swims all day and night. So many wet bikinis on the line. I love the natural light, the fresh air and the little jobs we do. I love my mom turning down her bed with her bedside lamp on giving light so pretty and then she goes down for her skinny dip. She always does this every night.
I love the corn on the cob, the tomatoes, the blueberries that pop in my mouth and peaches so sweet. I love the way the light hits the flowers at the end of the day on the path at the front. I love the spiderwebs in the morning. All that beautiful work. I love the many moods of the lake; sometimes angry and crashing itself, sometimes dead quiet and calm. Still and flat like a mirror.
I love the way my children, now teenagers, always invent things here; languages, routines, stories, recipes, inside jokes, plays, songs. I love that they read dozens of books and we have time to touch and explain things to each other.
I hate the way my father is not here. This is his place first. He is in the hospital and I swim in his lake. He loved swimming. He cannot walk well and I run down the road. I get the daily newspaper he used to love to read but cannot anymore. I hate that he is not coming home or here.
The leaves are changing. I am not ready yet.
Oh Nancy. I agree with Sara – beautiful post.
I am grateful everyday that I still have 2 healthy parents that are involved in our everyday life.
No words Nancy (and you know how odd that is for me)…beautiful post.