Perception can be a funny thing. What do you see when you look at this picture?
I see a perfectly happy healthy little boy. My doctor, and some other opinionated folks, see a little boy who is borderline delayed.
Yes, it’s true he isn’t walking or talking yet. Ok, technically he is sort of walking. I mean he has been standing and cruising around furniture for MONTHS now. In the past few weeks he has started taking the occasional few steps away from something. This week he has started stringing together 6-10 steps at a time. So anyway YES he can walk he just chooses not to the majority of the time.
As for the talking? Whatever, someday I’m sure I’ll wish that he would just STOP talking for a few minutes.
I went to Chase’s 18 month well check visit completely prepared to answer no to these questions and NOT feel bad about it. I was not however prepared for all the other things I had to say no too.
No Chase is not interested in potty training. No he is most definitely not running. No he doesn’t draw with crayons, I don’t give him crayons, he would just eat them. Speaking of eating, no he doesn’t eat a well balanced diet. No he doesn’t pretend to bring my cups of coffee or plates of food.
Oh and those? Those were the questions they just asked me. After that they brought out a little basket of toys to see if he would actually perform some skills. Have you ever tried to get a slightly traumatized been-at-the-doctor’s-office-for-45-minutes toddler perform on command. Yeah, it would have been easier to get Timothy Olyphant to show up at my house in his underwear. No he would not stack the blocks, but he would try to chew them. No he did not realize that you wanted him to stir a pretend drink when you handed him a toy cup and spoon. And NO he did not know what to do when you handed him a small plastic baby doll and bottle. I’m sorry accuse me of whatever stereotyping you want, he is a little boy, he has lots of trucks and tractors and blocks (that he CAN stack).
Apparently we have a lot of work to do before he turns two. Oy.
At this point I agree that monitoring is important just in case, but it’s early to truly worry yet. I know plenty of kids who don’t start walking until 18 months – including my husband, who is just fine, thanks! Sometimes kids are just going on their own schedule and get there in good time. As long as doctors and you are still at the point of thinking you should keep an eye open and no one is throwing red flags, well, I don’t think stressing helps you or your kiddo.
Beth and Mindy: I think that’s my issue with this, I feel like I would *know* if something were truly wrong. I want to just enjoy him at this age instead of pushing him to do things he isn’t ready for.
Christine: don’t feel bad, I welcome any and all opinions. I hope that I’m not making excuses for him and that I really would know if something were truly wrong. I attribute a lot of the delays to him being an only child (until now) and staying home with me. We are having monthly meetings with a group called Parents As Teachers just to monitor his progress, just in case my instincts are wrong.
I hate stepping into these conversations because I don’t want to be the special needs mom that puts her nose into everything related to it.
Go with your gut.
I had more people than I could ever count make excuses for my kid’s delays – he’s so big that’s why he’s not walking, he’s a boy, he’s a late baby (Nov), his older brother does all his talking…blah blah blah…I knew better and I went with my gut.
People were telling me what they thought I wanted to hear. What I wanted to hear was that I wasn’t crazy and that my son’s issues were beyond being a late bloomer.
Use your instincts – we’ve got them for a reason!
Some kids take longer than others.
That being said, early intervention is the key for so many kids.
I wouldn’t worry unless you really feel that something is wrong.
I know it can be frustrating. I went through similar things with a pediatrician over nursing issues (even though the baby was gaining incredible amounts of weight, I was doing it *wrong*). As a parent and teacher, in the long run, it all evens out. In a few months (and few years) no one will be able to tell he was “delayed” by any standard. And, *you* know your child best – no doctor or other expert can know them as well as you do.
Rest easy, have fun with your baby boy, and enjoy him. I’m fully in the “wish they would stop talking” zone (my daughters are 9 and 7 years) and have to consciously remind myself to enjoy them at their current stage 🙂 (currently debating Santa, elves, and magic – loudly!)
He is so cute, it makes me miss the baby days (and wonder what my life might have been like with a son instead of daughters 🙂