I live halfway across the country from one sister and her kids, and across the Atlantic from my other sister and hers. It’s hard to be so far away from my sisters, but we talk on the phone, we share photos on facebook and we see each other about once a year and that is okay, when you’re an adult. But our kids – they’re not on facebook, they don’t pick up the phone and call their cousins and so they only get to interact when their parents get together.
What amazes me – and always has – is the depth of the relationships they have developed with each other, despite the fact that they don’t see each other on a very regular basis. It started when my sister’s guy (the first grandchild) couldn’t stop talking about his little cousin, “Baby Charlotte” as he called her for the longest time. These kids had only met 2 or 3 times, and yet when my parents brought my nephew to visit for my daughter’s first birthday, they got along as if they saw each other every weekend. And it didn’t stop there. My kids talk about their cousins all the time, and when they see each other, they just pick up where they left off as if it hasn’t been six months or a year since they last hung out or played together.
Even though they’re getting older they’re still super-close, despite the difference in age (my gal is 14 months younger than her cousin) and gender. And this closeness applies to all the cousins, even the youngest, who is just a toddler (and her sibling, due in December). I know my kids absolutely adore their young cousin, and are anticipating the arrival of the newest cousin with great excitement, begging to go to England to visit them.
Look at the love!
Living apart as we do, our kids all have friends that they see much more often than their cousins, and we’re all close with families that live nearby. But I know my kids feel just about as comfortable in my sister’s house as they do in our own, and more comfortable than they do in the homes of the friends they see every week.
I can’t explain this connection, other than to guess that somehow, through genetics or upbringing or the sharing of family values through a similar upbringing, our kids just connect with their cousins (and aunts & uncles) in a special, deeper way. Call it blood ties if you like; all I know is that, on some level, our kids all just know that they are special to each other.
And here’s evidence that the ties between cousins and their teddy bears spans generations: This is a picture of mine and Jen’s seven year-old daughters enjoying playing with their Mommys’ own first teddy bears, Orange Juice (left) and Cinnamon. Just goes to show you…some things are worth keeping!
I still like playing with my cousins, and their kids.
I’m emailing my cousins right now…..
Great post and so true!
My middle sister had her first (a girl) 6 days before Eva was born.
They live out in BC – but whenever they come visit, it’s like they’ve never been apart.
My oldest sister has teenagers and they are so great with my kids, even though it’s the farthest thing from cool to be hanging out with little kids.
Somehow it’s different because they’re cousins.
To this day 2 of Sean’s closest friends are his cousins.
I LOVE watching the cousins play together! I SO remember loving to play with my own cousins and agree that there is nothing as special as this bond except maybe siblings.
Love it! Wish I could have been there as it is so special. I remember it with our cousins.
It’s not even a blood tie, I don’t think. because my kids and my (step)brother’s kids share no actual blood…but they love them like I have never seen kids love each other. Cousins share a REALLY special bond.