There are many, many items for sale out there, but I sometimes wonder if some of these things are a joke. (Also, I think I might need to stop watching television.)
One day I’ll scan the business section of the newspaper and see that something called “The Bumpit” has sold a bajillion units, and I quickly feel like I’m in the wrong business. I mean, who buys these things?!
In the interest of not making your house fat, I thought I’d give you some examples of items to avoid buying or to destroy immediately if you already own them.
Things like the infamous Snuggie, which should be banned across the land. Seriously. Get yourself a comfy sweater. Or a gorgeous blanket. Or both. If you feel you absolutely must, wear it backwards in the comfort of your own home. I’ll bet you even have one or both of these items a mere ten or twelve paces from you right now, which would make purchasing one of these hideous things a complete waste of money and phone time. And then you won’t feel the need to hide it if company comes over unexpectedly – how could you explain owning one? *shudders* I know they come in a myriad of colours, but none of them will look good on you. Not on any of you. (Especially not the one in leopard print. Nu-no. NO!)
You need to make A LOT of meatloaves in order to make this thing worth your while. I mean, really. The Perfect Meatloaf? Sounds more like The Perfect Way To Clutter The F&^$ Out Of My Perfectly Organized Baking Cupboard. Some things are just not necessary. Move on.
Any product that cooks eggs outside of their shells for convenience. The ads make it sound as if all that peeling of hard boiled eggs just takes aaaaaaall daaaaaaaaay, and wouldn’t you rather be jumping rope, or wearing your Snugglie? Oh my god. If that ONE TIME you require egg salad for four hundred people, please just hire a caterer. Otherwise, put some water to boil and just drop the egg in the pot – I promise, it’s that simple. You will survive without this contraption taking up precious space in your drawers, or in that far, far away space over the fridge.
Pajama Jeans. I can’t even tell you how sad these make me feel.
I. Can’t. Even.
Please don’t buy these. They go against everything that is good and pure about the world. Just…. no.
Say NO to these things and others like them. Don’t be swayed by that talk of “order now, because we can’t do this all day” crap. They can, and they DO do this all day. This is how they take your monies, and you, in exchange, end up with your very own Slap Chop, some crappy Ginsu knives, and hearing aids/eavesdropping apparatus that I’m pretty sure ought to be illegal. You can feel how wrong they are when you try to buy these things, so save yourself the aggravation, and just put the phone down.
Consider this an intervention. You’re welcome, Internets.
Got an incredible-TV-offer habit you can’t seem to curb? Tell me all about it right here…
Oh god, the whole notion of pajama jeans is just. so. wrong. Pants you wear outside of the house should have buttons, waistbands, and zippers. Period. (Unless you are headed to the gym, then you can wear your workout pants there.)
But? Secretly? The basement workroom at work is so cold, I’m finding the notion of a snuggie evilly tempting. Don’t worry! Haven’t fallen prey to the seduction of warmth *and* arm mobility yet. Just saying. My hoodie doesn’t always cut it.
*head hits desk*
Well, if you promise to never leave the house in them… wait, no. They’re terrible. Sorry. THROW THEM AWAY!! *wink*
My daughter bought me pajama jeans for Christmas as a gag gift. I will never leave the house with them on but I must admit that they are comfy and make my butt look great.
No! Avert your eyes!! Run away!!
Thanks for reading, lady… 😉
So funny! Although I must say I am tempted to call and order the pajama jeans each time I see the commercial. They just look too darn comfortable to pass on!
Oh Desi… please. Back. Away. From. The. Pajama. Jeans.
Also? You might need to replace this “friend” trying to foist them on you. I’m just sayin’. (You might be able to order a new one by phone, though…)
*snickers* 😉
You know, someone I know was raving about pajama jeans, not long ago. RAVING about them! I couldn’t bring myself to try them, if only just because they look and feel remarkably like maternity pants and I don’t need to live that memory again!