Monday afternoon, along with 8 million other people, we were driving back from Northern Ontario. But what the other 8 million people didn’t have was a special blankie or three stuck in the Thule bag on the roof rack. Did you know that you can’t really pull over and get a special blankie when you’re in a traffic jam? Did you know that certain soon-to-be-five-year-olds really REALLY want that blanket when the stopping in the traffic jam wakes them up? Oh yes. Epic tantrum. Kicking, screaming, crying. After three nights of too little sleep for mom, being horrified that my friends were witnessing this, I could have snapped. I could have easily snapped. Frankly, if my friends weren’t there, there would have been tears from both of us and I would have yelled at the top of my lungs and I would have wanted to slug him. I wouldn’t have but I could see how a parent could lose it in extreme circumstances.
Last week in Ontario, there was a tragic death of a two-year-old who was left in the car accidentally by grandparents who were babysitting. A tragedy. On so many levels. Any article that was published on the story was followed by a million comments like this.
How the f^%& can anyone be so stupid.
They should rot in hell.
I hope they get thrown in jail.
Here’s the thing. Nobody knows what the hell people are going through. No one knows the situation. How can you judge unless you know what’s happening with people? It made me think of this amazing video (thanks Lizzy). It’s an ad for a hospital but take the 4.5 minutes to watch it. It just may change the way you think about things. It seriously has for me.
[youtube id=”Wl2_knlv_xw”]
Maybe before we’re so quick to judge people, we should take a breath and think about what might be going on behind the scenes. This doesn’t even have to be in the case of tragedy but just in everyday life. Why is that waitress being such a bitch? Maybe she got a call about increasing her student loan payment? Why is your landlord ignoring your calls? Maybe his wife left him last week. I don’t know! I’m just making these scenarios up but do you know what I mean???
Be Kind
I just think we all need to take a deep breath sometimes and remember, crap happens that we don’t know anything about. Let’s stop the judging.
I try very hard to give a person the benefit of the doubt, because we JUST DON’T KNOW what it’s like to be in that person’s shoes.
“There but for the grace of God go I…”
God knows I’ve been judged as a poor parent. Cuyler as a giant brat. I guess that comes with parenting, but something changed last year for me on a wider scale.
Ever since we lost my brother-in-law last September, my first inclination now is to be compassionate. To everybody.
In the midst of our grief we had people judging him because he took his own life.
“How selfish.” “How could he do that to his daughter?” “What a coward.”
Imagine hearing things like about someone as you plan their funeral?
People have NO idea the battles that others are facing and/or fighting.
I had this conversation just yesterday with a friend. We both immediately thought…how will this family cope? It’s family…no strangers involved. Everyone involved must be in shock. It’s devastating. No one intentionally did anything to result in this tragedy. I haven’t heard the reason behind this story yet. BUT we thought…what if it happened to us? What if the care of our small kids were with aging grandparents who all of the sudden, perhaps, just maybe, in the moment simply cannot remember what they just did. What if?
Oh God, Sara. It happened again yesterday in Edmonton. And before anyone thinks to judge, they should all read this Pulitzer Prize-winning article:
http://www.pulitzer.org/works/2010-Feature-Writing
thanks for this Kath – I’ve shared it with a slew of people – and it’s opened some eyes. amazing article.