One of the things I noticed about being a parent is, I never realized how much free time I had before kids. Then I soon realized that the chaos that comes with being in a family is your new normal. For me, my 20’s and 30’s could not have been more different. I can only speak for myself but doesn’t it seem like life in your 20’s are about trying to figure things out, then in your 30’s…it’s go time. It’s like being in a dress rehearsal for a decade and then one day you’re centre stage. And not only are you on centre stage but there are a lot of people relying on you to deliver one heck of a performance. I can only imagine what comes with your 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and beyond.
My wife and I were talking the other day about what we’ve done since 2006. We realized we had at least one major event in each year (minus 2010).
2006 – our first house –
2007- got married
2008 – had Travis
2009 – our second house
2010 – took a year off from homes and kids
2011 – had Rory
2012 – our third house
2013 – we’re not buying another house. So if your reading this Charlene, please let me know if there’s something I should know because I’m sensing a pattern here.
In my twenties I use to be able to stretch out a few chores to last the entire day. Not only that, I use to complain about what I had to do and how tired I was. All I had to do was take care of me, and I could barley do that.
Take a typical Saturday about 10-12 years ago:
Step 1 – wake up around 10am Step2 – eat cereal Step 3 – catch up on the sports scores Step 4 – nap Step 5 – shower Step 6 – get ready for the loooong grueling day Step7- go to grocery store Step 8 – buy instant noodles Step 9 – buy beer Step 10 – watch TV Step 11 – nap Step 12 – call some friends to see what’s going on Step 13 – 2nd shower Step 14- go to friends house Step 15 – drink beer Step 16 – watch Leafs lose with friends Step 17- go to bar Step 18 – leave bar and buy street meat Step 19 – cab it home Step 20 – go to bed
Take a typical Saturday nowadays with a wife and 2 kids under 5:
Step 1 – wake up around 6am Step 2 – make kids breakfast Step 3 – catch up on kids shows Step 4 – clean up kitchen Step 5 – do laundry Step 6 – get the kids dressed Step 7 – go to grocery store Step 8 – buy everything but instant noodles (or so it seems) Step 9 – buy beer (that part doesn’t change much) Step 10 – mow the lawn Step 11- take the kids to yet another birthday party Step 12 – shower (and by shower I mean wife goes to yet another baby shower) Step 13 – play with the kids Step 14 – thinking of what to make for dinner Step 15 – order dinner instead Step16 – watch Leafs lose with family Step 17 – wrap present for yet another birthday party the next day Step 18 – bathe the kids with soap and water Steps 19 – bathe my liver with beer and vodka Step 20 – go to bed
As I said off the top, you, like me, probably have a very busy life. I bet it’s go, go, go from the moment you open your eyes. You’ve got work, kids, school, sports, dance, and lots of birthday parties. It’s crazy right? But a good crazy. In fact, a great crazy, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Chaos feels like home to me now.
Sonya D says
Life has changed but most surprising for me was friends without kids when ours were really young, they couldn’t understand why we couldn’t stay out as late as before kids, couldn’t just drop and leave to head to Vegas for a weekend…until they had their own. Now that mine are getting older things are shifting again. A little more freedom but also the need to prioritize even more so. Life is full!
Julie says
i’m shocked, not about the free time, but about all the money i ‘wasted’. i’m a SAHM, still have a car, still have a house, still can go away on vacation occasionally and we lost my income 10 years ago to become a professional parent. what did i do with all of my money???? besides, play ultimate, buy shoes, go on “dirty weekends”, eat out…have fun….
that is the only advice i give new parents…save one salary, you can seriously do it.
Jen Maier, urbanmoms says
My husband and I talk about that all the time. What did we do with ourselves before kids? And what will we do with our time after…