I remember a beautiful morning the first year I was separated-one so warm and full of promise I could not wait to open the windows and let spring inside. The outside world sent me a sight both hard and sharp. There were dads (husbands) on every lawn, mowing, pumping tires and cleaning yards. It was … [Read more...]
these are the good old days
You know the one about the priest, the minister and the rabbi discussing the beginning of life. The priest says it begins at conception, the minister disagrees saying it begins at birth. They look to the rabbi for the tie breaker-'when do you believe that life begins?' The rabbi gives a shrug 'when … [Read more...]
I couldn’t leave the porch light on
Many or at least a few dumb country western love songs have talked about "leaving the porch light on" as a way to signal a welcome or open arms to a loved one. My porch light was burnt out for two months before I seemed able to get to it, signaling, if nothing else, an inability to get it all done.I … [Read more...]
the slushy theory
One summer my friends took their children, 8 and 10, to Italy for three weeks. They spared no expense, having both an authentic and ridiculously good time. Sophisticated in a simple way but not stuffy.When the children returned to school after labour day, each were, in their separate grades, asked … [Read more...]
shout it out
My girls and I pulled up in front of Grace's house to do an Art Party for her 7th birthday. She was shouting and jumping up and down, screaming, "my birth father is here, my birth father is here." As I got closer she explained to me that he had come for her party and that she was so happy. She … [Read more...]
Penney smart dollar foolish
Alexandra Penney lost a large fortune with schemer Bernie Madoff. From that experience she wrote a book, "Paper Bag Lady" and used the difficulty to re create herself. She talks about how fear (which always accompanies big loss) can either paralyze you or motivate you. She chanted homemade … [Read more...]
3 years and a lifetime
Today, September 6 2009, I have been separated 3 years and a lifetime. I remember being married the way you remember a book or a movie; moments, general plot and some feeling around all of it. It actually no longer feels like I ever starred in it.I spoke to my ex husband this morning and felt … [Read more...]
lessons dangling like apples
It is shocking to be divorced. The word has a hard sound like death but with a bitter chaser. It is a life that went down a path, crooked and interesting and then suddenly hit a cliff or a dead-end. In order to take a different road you had to back track over the mess, the crookedness, the … [Read more...]
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