So like most plans that seemed to good to be true – they were. My hubby and I had it all planned out. He would come home during the last week of school so he would be able to attend our sons Grade 6 grad, we would let the children skip the last day and head out to Grand Bend for a mini 5 day vacation in the cottage we rented. This all started out fine and dandy and the drive there was the typical “How much longer?” “I have to pee.” “I’m hungry.” “Sebastian is staring at me.” “I really have to pee now!” And this was just over the first half hour.
By the second night the hubby started complaining that his gut hurt. Now anyone who knows my husband knows that he is as melodramatic and attention seeking as the rest of my children, so I did what any good wife would do – I ignored him.
By the fourth day he was complaining that his ass hurt. I informed him that he was being a big pain in my ass and to get over it.
The day after we arrived home he was still complaining, so I sent him to the Dr. He came home and informed me that the Dr. gave him some medication for internal hemorrhoids I tried to keep a straight face really I did, but I found the whole thing really funny.
His complaining didn’t stop and all I kept hearing was him screaming “My f@#&ing ass hurts!” He must have had about a zillion baths with Epson salts and continued with the medication. Still the complaints continued and he lay in bed for (gasp!) 5 days (don’t worry mama’s I have a whole blog about when we get sick). I told him there must be something else going on because if hemorrhoids really caused this much pain than every pregnant woman would be on bed rest!
I took the decision that he needed to go to the hospital. There was one slight dilemma and that being that he was supposed to take care of the other children while I took Sebastian to his ball hockey tournament. It was too late to get a babysitter so I decided to drop the hubby off at the emergency dept and then take all 8 children to the tournament.
Was I ever shocked when only an hour after dropping him off, the hubby texts me that they are admitting him! Turns out he never had hemorrhoids at all – he had an abscess that was infected. By the time he got to the hospital his body was developing a systematic infection throughout his body. Surgery is the only option for this so he was scheduled for the next morning to go under the knife and have it dealt with.
Well I sort of survived the tournament and managed to get through the surgery and am happy to report that he is at home but must have a home nurse come every day to pack the wound. The biggest disappointed is that he came home to spend time with his children and only got to do that for a few days. He will have to go back to Saskatchewan in a week or so and continue the home care there for a few months. This means it will be back to just me and 8 children. Lets hope next time he comes home there will be no more pains in the ass.
Until next time
Chantel, momof8crazymonkeys
Here is the card my son made for him!
Chantelle Mercik says
Bla Blub , Bla BlubBla Blub Bla Blub Bla BlubBla Blub.
Chantel says
ha, ha the tournament was something all right! But that will be saved for another post lol. Trust me the whining from my hubby right now is crazzzzy and you would think he was on his death bed – I have to keep reminding him that I had 5 c-sections, and after knee surgery was walking around Marineland – hmp! I suppose nothing compares to his ass:)
Chantel says
Yes well he is such a big pain in the ass it’s easy to blog about it;) The hardest part right now is dealing with the whining – holy it is worse than the kiddies. Gotta love him though.
DesiValentine says
I’m bowing to you, right now. Eight kids to a hockey tournament? While your husband goes through Emerg? After family car trip to anywhere? Wowzers. My husband attains all levels of Man Cold ridiculousness when he’s sick or injured. May the force be with you, lady!
Sara says
OH my GOD!!!!!!!! I think I just gagged….and can I love the fact that a. within a week here you blogged about your husbands ass and b. the cartoon at the bottom. I can already tell I’ll love you.
Chantel says
Thanks Julie!
Chantel says
ha, ha a pony would be easier to take of right now I’ll tell you! As he starts to feel better the melodramatics come out in full force:)
Tracey says
Oh, your poor husband! And poor YOU!? Gosh, lady… sounds like everything is going to be okay, but holy smokes!! You deserve a pony…
Julie says
oh my goddess. here’s hoping he’s recovering well and that a real vacation with the kids is coming up!