“Dear Parent, your child’s vision was screened at school today. We recommend you follow up with an appointment at the optometrist,” read the note she came home with a couple weeks ago. Not thinking much of it, I booked a time with our eye doctor and my girl hopped up into the big black chair and read letters off the wall. Her first eye was great. Then the doctor covered it up and asked her to read the chart with the other eye. She couldn’t do it. At all.
Glasses it is.
My little girl was shuffled into the main lobby and told to pick a pair of frames she liked. She tried on about 20 pairs, looking at herself in the mirror each time, shaking her head and taking them off. It was too much to take it at once, in front of everyone there, so we took a few pairs home for her to choose from. As we were driving home she sadly said, “I tried them all on and nothing looked good on me.”
My heart, it broke.
I tried to buoy her spirits, to remind her that she is beautiful and that the glasses will help her eye get strong again. When we got home she curled up in my lap and I asked her, “Do you wish you didn’t have to get glasses?”
And then she cried, her freckled nose wrinkling as the tears spilled over. “Everyone is going to laugh at me. No one else in my class wears glasses.”
After some more talking, more listening, more hugs and words of encouragement, she started to warm to the idea. We sat down and she spent some time picking her favourite ones: a bold-rimmed tortoise-shell pair. She is going to look adorable.
But. It was hard to watch her get pushed from the ledge of carefree childhood into the sea of self-consciousness. She didn’t like what she saw in the mirror and no kid should feel that way. I knew that feeling well as I spent the bulk of my childhood years battling it and I want something different, something better, for her.
My beautiful girl, with the tortoise-shell specs, I hope she will always know how lovely she is.
My5 year-old had to get glasses this year too – turns out she couldn’t see a darned thing! She is happy to wear them most of the time because she can see so.much.better. with them, but of course there are times when she wants to be carefree and take them off. Her prescription is really high but we spent the extra cash for the thin lenses even though she’s a kid. I wanted to spare her any teasing that could come from thick lenses.
This parenting gig ain’t easy! but we’ll get through it!
My daughter has worn glasses since she was 5 and they are just a part of who she is. She likes wearing them because she sees better. It is as simple as that. She has special sports goggles for soccer and hockey and skiing.
At 9.5 there are times when she wishes she could go spec free but overall they have been such huge part of her that I think she would feel naked without them. And, she looks beautiful with them on. I am so used to them now I can’t imagine her without!
Awesome job super-mom! It sounds like you intuitively knew what she needed, whether it be time to digest the new info, help to identify her emotions, some space to cry privately, encouragement to be proud of who she is, and the chance to pick a pair out without onlookers when she was ready – you rock! I’m so glad she has a mama like you to remind her that she is valuable no matter what.
my mom let me get a little engraving down in the bottom corner of my lenses when i first got my glasses in grade 5 to up the cool factor. unfortunately, it was 1980 when nothing looked good on anyone! 🙂 i’m so jealous of all the fantastic kid frames out there now!
I’m ditto’ing everything in Tracey’s comment. I bet she’ll look ADORABLE. And good for her for going bold – it took me 30 years of wearing them to go bold!
I have worn glasses since grade 4 and have never found a pair I LOVE on me, but I have had several pairs that got me compliments. For what it’s worth, I have yet to see a child in glasses who I didn’t think totally rocked them – either cute as a button or bold and cheeky. I bet she looks great, and like Tracey says, will gain confidence as she sees how much they help her. Hate to think of her sad wee heart today, but tomorrow will be better. I’d love to see a pic too, so we can all send her compliments.
Oh, sweet girl! Poor love… I’m sure she looks adorable in the ones she chose, but it pinches to think of her feeling so sad about it. She’ll wear them well – as soon as she sees no one is laughing (and how much better she can see with them on) I’ll bet she’ll grow to love her bold, new specs. I’d LOVE to see a pic of her smiling in them!!