We see children have public tantrums all the time. They scream, cry and sometimes hit anything within arm’s length. Sure, as a bystander it can get pretty annoying, but is it ever so bad that you feel you need to intervene and say something about it?
Now before you answer that question, get a load of this story.
Bree Hajek-Richardson was checking out at a Nordstrom Rack in California, when a little boy began having a meltdown in the shopping cart beside her. According to the 20-year-old, the boy’s outburst was “a little bit loud” so she decided to confront the boy’s mom about it.
“It wasn’t bothering me, [the tantrum] but it was just the volume was a little bit loud. It was hurting my ears so I asked her very nicely to calm her child down a little bit, you know, the volume,” she told local news.
That’s where things went from bad, to worse. The mom, who hasn’t been identified, didn’t take Hajek-Richardson’s words very well, telling her “not to tell her child what to do.” Hajek-Richardson tried to assure the mom that that wasn’t what she as trying to do, only that she wanted her son to calm down.
Before leaving the store, Hajek-Richardson told the mom to go to hell, to which the mom replied “I’ll see you there.” The situation should have ended there, but it didn’t.
When Hajek-Richardson left the store, she said the mom began following her into the parking lot. “(She asked) me, ‘Where’d you tell me to go?’ So I repeated again what I said to her, and I told her that I told her to go to hell.”
According to Hajek-Richardson, the mom punched her in the face twice and then took off. Police are currently trying to track down her down using security video (that you can watch here) that caught the entire incident.
Hajek-Richardson admits that this isn’t the first time she’s confronted a parent about their loud children, only the first time someone has gotten physical with her for it. Despite the bruises she is now left with from the physical altercation, she says she won’t let the incident prevent her from speaking up to parents in the future.
What do you think: should people be able to confront parents when their children are having a public meltdown?
She should sue that woman for punching her. If some child was purposely screaming or having a little fit I would say something to her too. Yes we all know that kids are spoiled little brats but that’s no reason to just let them do as they please. This is why they grow up to be very screwed up individuals because they lack discipline.
Frankly, if a child is having a meltdown at a store like Nordstrom, perhaps it’s time to go home? In my experience, the worst threat to a child is the threat of being taken home where the potential for boring/mundane activity is high. The grocery store – as an example – is a different story becasue this is something that NEEDS to be done. But there is absolutely no NEED for a child to be at Nordstrom, especially if they are having a tantrum, and ESPECIALLY if it is the middle of teh afternoon (ever heard of nap-time?). Obvsiouly, there is nothing you can do to stop a child from screaming. They are people with free-will and will do as they please if so inclined. But mom could have taken some action and left the store. I work in a dental clinic in a mall and put up with children’s screaming almost daily. When I see children being dragged around with Aritzia and Forever 21 bags in moms hands at 1:30 in the afternoon, all I can think is that poor child is being forced to walk around a busy mall, most likely during nap/lunch time so that mom can get some shopping done.
I was at costco when my toddler kept misbehaving. Climbing on tables, on her little brother’s stroller while he was sleeping. I kept on telling her to quit it and stop while I’m trying to get photos printed out. This old lady next to me lashed out telling me to shut up because I’m so loud and I’m bothering her while she was trying to concentrate printing pictures. I was boiled! I wanted to punch her face! I didn’t…my husband didn’t stand up for me too…he hasn’t heard the end of that yet. But kids will be kids…they have meltdowns. Some people should just sympathize or at least feel or show empathy and mind their own business. If you can calm my child down, be my guest. I’m doing what i can as a mom. I don’t abuse my children, and I’m doing what i could to discipline my children. Violence is not an answer but I’m on the mom’s side. What if her son has mental issues…they tend to be louder and more difficult to calm down. It was probably overwhelming for the mom too…let alone to have 20 yr old telling her what to do. She will understand once she has children. In the mean time, keep it to yourself.
violence does not solve anything. that being said i secretly smiled that she got punched for it. when my kids had meltdowns i could have dunked them in a pool full of smarties and chocolate sauce and they wouldn’t have calmed down. there’s a point in a meltdown where you can do absolutely nothing except finish what you’re doing (if you’re up to it) and leave.
what was this woman expecting to happen? is she that dumb that the thought the mother didn’t realize her kid was being loud? we know our kids can be loud! and we try to deal with it and having people like her adding to our stress will not work out well for anyone.
I have kids – they have meltdowns too. As a parent, I usually feel really under the microscope and frazzled if they are being loud (whether from a meltdown or from excitement). But, telling a parent to quiet their kid isn’t in anyway helpful or practical. How do you stop a screaming child? Honestly. You can shush them, threaten them, talk to them, sing to them, bribe them, hold them, etc – but if they want to scream, they are going to be loud no matter what you do. Personally, if a child is having a problem at a store, I usually do something silent – like make faces or smile at them, etc until they catch my eye. It doesn’t always work, but sometimes it helps diffuse the moment. See if you can help somehow to make the situation better. That would be 10000 times better than telling me to quiet my kid.
That being said – no matter how stressed out or frazzled the mom with screaming kid is, or what the situation was with her child – there should NEVER be a need for a moment like this get to the point it did in this story. :/ Violence doesn’t help your child learn to be calm! :/