Well, by now everyone knows that Oprah Winfrey is ending her daytime television show after a twenty-five year run, this afternoon. It’s something I’ve watched at 4 PM, pretty much every day for close to fifteen years. I’m distressed, to say the very least.
There are people out there who are not fans of Oprah – some who are even quick to discredit her at every turn… I have nothing to say to such people – they do not belong to my tribe. But for the rest of us, I extend my arms in an enormous, world-wide group-hug. Our 4 PM trusted and valued lady-friend is leaving the ‘hood, and we will all surely miss her.
I’ve been working from home since the late 90’s, and though I never watched soap operas (not since Santa Barbara went of the air during my high school years) I’d catch Oprah from time to time, and many shows grabbed my attention. She has a knack for shining light on all kinds of issues – about health, and sanity, and insanity, and children, and education… she had lots of less-appealing shows too, about junk I forget now… and that’s the point: there was something for everyone. For women and men alike.
She gave me glimpses into other people’s lives, be they heroic or tragic, and at 4 PM on most days, I found myself considering ideas perhaps I’d never thought of before. I’d watch and listen to a conversation with a celebrity or a person of note. Sometimes the interviews were terrific… sometimes less so. I think I loved them all though. Discussing day to day things about the lives of ordinary people made me feel connected to others around me, which can’t be a bad thing.
Of the lessons learned? There are so, SO many… but three that always come to mind are:
- When you know better, you do better. (This helps me forgive people more easily.)
- When people show you who they are, believe them the first time. (This saves me sooooo much time.)
- Does your face light up when your child walks in the room? (This one really helps keep me in check sometimes.)
Oprah-the-woman, in many ways, became Oprah-the-machine – there’s a reason she’s as rich as she is (or Oprah-rich, as one can qualify when making comparisons… as in, “The dude is rich… but, you know, not Oprah-rich…”) but she’s also an incredibly generous woman. We’ve watched her give away all kinds of stuff, from cashmere sweaters and socks, to houses, trips and cars. YOU get a car… and YOU! get a car… and YOU! get a car!! (And no, I don’t think her intention was to create a tax-nightmare for all the recipients.) I think it’s pretty cool to take your entire audience to Australlia with you. And to get John Travolta to fly you there, to boot. She can get anyone to do just about anything. That’s because people like her so much. Because she’s Oprah, yo.
She hangs out with rock stars and queens. Super-huge celebrities get star-struck and all shaky-nervous when they meet her. The President and his wife have dropped by to visit. She builds schools, and hands out scholarships almost like candy, it would seem. She helped get America reading again, even if some of her selections were not exactly challenging for readers such as myself. She puts on a pretty great party. She made miracles happen. I’ll bet she could move a mountain if she wanted to.
And at the heart of it all, she is just one woman. One incredibly strong, hard-working woman, with drive and talent, and an excellent team around her to make her Machine work its magic… but she’s still just one woman. And given where she comes from, from the time in American history that she comes from, it is truly remarkable what she’s been able to build and achieve. I mean, really! But, she is not infallible – she makes mistakes like everybody else. It can’t be easy to live your life so publicly all the time. And yet, look at what she made. She’s very good at paying her good fortune forward, too.
When she got excited, I did too. When she cried, I cried. (Man, I cried A LOT!) But always in a good way. Caring. Cleansing. Even when it was The Ugly Cry, it was all good.
I always loved it when her Machine managed to surprise Oprah herself. I loved the look on her face of disbelief when her idol, Mary-Tyler Moore came on her show for the first time… that was really swell. To see a woman who has everything she can possibly buy for herself be blown-away-surprised by anything at all was really special to watch.
Oprah is good. I will miss her at 4 PM each day. I will miss feeling a part of something collectively shared by so many, all over the world – it was a good feeling – like being part of a non-exclusive club or something. Did you see that thing on Oprah yesterday? No?! Oh honey, let me tell you… Shucks. I could cry right now.
On the upside, I just might start answering my phone at 4 PM again, and I’m deadly serious when I say I haven’t done that since about 1998. Not unless it was my sister ringing, just as the picture was cutting to commercial. Anyone else got, “Did someone die? Why are you calling me? Do you KNOW what TIME it is?!” and a quick flush. The children haven’t even been allowed to breathe at Oprah-time while they’re in the same room with me. I *might* be more civil at 4 PM after today.
One last thing: There’s always been a weird speculation that Oprah and Gayle King are lesbian lovers, which strikes me as completely ridiculous, (c’mon now!) since I just don’t think Oprah is much of a liar. But if it was true, would it even matter a wit? I don’t think so. Because she’s Oprah, yo.
Brava, Oprah Winfrey!! I look forward to your next chapter, but it won’t be nearly the same…
When you’re right, you’re right, Shannon. I should have left that part under the “excitement” and not the “generous” part, as it pertains to the cars and some of the gifts. And she ALWAYS credits her supporters when she gives stuff away – yes. I’d still say she’s extremely generous: not only in spirit, but also with her own cash… and there’s probably a huge amount she does with her own dollars that she doesn’t proclaim to the world. Of course, that’s just a hunch – she might be a completely evil, cash hoarding bitch – but I doubt it. 😉
when you say that oprah gives away cars and sweaters right after you say she’s rich… many people will assume it’s oprah footing the bill. IT IS NOT
sponsors pay for the prizes – in return, they get a plug on tv (a hugh one, coming from oprah)
people: she gives some great advice but she DOESN’T give cars. stop the perpetuating this myth
ME TOO!! There certainly have been times when I totally LIVED for that show… it was my little break of sanity that I craved and depended on. (And whenever I didn’t get it, I got all stabby – just ask the children.)
I’ll bet a lot of people everywhere feel just as we do – that she’s our friend, and that we totally know her… what a weird and wonderful life she has. Wow!!
Thanks so much, Sara! She and her show have just been such a constant in my life for SO many years… it’s amazing to me. She’s amazing to me.
Her antics with Gayle were actually some of my lest favourite moments, actually. Dunno why – those were the shows I watched with only one eye open… but I think it’s so cool that they have such an wonderful friendship. I’m happy for Oprah that she has that.
It was a great run, wasn’t it?
I tell ya…when I was on maternity leave I lived for Oprah. LIVED. It’s funny because I do feel like she’s a real-life close friend, ya know? Like if I saw her on the street we’d just go, “Ohmygod! So great to see you again!” And envelop each other in hugs. But then again, maybe I would and I suspect if I did, she’d accept it with a smile 🙂
So true, I was thinking about that, that for being a black woman in a white man’s business, she has done SO much without changing who she is just by working hard and knowing people and being a real person. There’s a big lesson there, or at least hope, because that is really the ideal of the whole dream, isn’t it? That it’s for anyone who has the smarts, the drive, the refusal to be ordinary.
crikey…..you said it all so well that I guess I won’t!!!!!!!!!!! So I’ll just add what I was about to write – love her or hate her you just can’t argue with how she changed the world.
She got people to read. She got people to think charitably. She got people to admit their demons and got help. AND she let a kabillion women out there, including my mom, think it was okay to have a yo-yo battle with their weight and not feel so all alone!
Her relationship with Gayle made it all real for me. Their road trip thing was one of my personal favourites.
I thought today’s show was such an amazing summary (although a tad preachy and rehearsed..). I love the ‘you’re responsible for your own life’ credo and the ‘watch what you put out there’ one. So wise. And I just picked up the part about having your face light up for your kids a few weeks ago and it resonates with me daily. Thanks for this Tracey – it was awesome!
Those were some of the doozies for me. I think she’s one of the most generous people out there. That’s never a bad thing!! xox
Seriously, lady – you know it. I wholeheartedly agree. I watched that first show with the young senator campaigning… and I watched Oprah get that look in her eye… and I knew. And when he was sworn in, I cried looking at my son, who will also be a black man in this world, and I cried like a baby for his possibilities.
I’m so happy America has had an educated black woman in their living rooms every day for all these years, because people needed to see a person of colour who was not a buffoon, you know? The playing field got levelled. Anyone can do anything. This is good for the world. 🙂
oh I love those Oprah lessons- thank you for listing them- need to put on fridge NOW.
the world is always critical of those living big. She is living BIG and I think she has done amazing things.
good girl for writing about her! xn
You know, I haven’t watch Oprah regularly for years, but I so admire everything that she is. Everything that she’s DONE. I remember watching Barack Obama on the Oprah Winfrey Show, back in the day when he was a local representative living in an apartment in the ‘hood. I remember watching that man SPEAK, and watching Oprah get that look (you know that look) in her eyes, and wondering to myself “Will the Oprah Nation give the US it’s first black president?” And she did. They did. HE did. And now my son, who will be a black man in a world where black men are often far too good at limiting themselves, has one fewer reason to say “I can’t.” That’s what Oprah did, in a million different big and small ways, for people of any gender, race, level of education, and income bracket. She blew away our excuses for limiting ourselves. We have been so lucky to have shared her time.
Yes, Alice! I loved seeing her get turned on by a new idea, just like everyone else. Normal things. Maybe because she wasn’t born rich… She got a lot of people to stop driving and phoning/texting, which is an excellent thing. She has a lot of influence, and I believe she uses it for good. Good for her! Good for the world, too. 🙂
She really is a gift – I agree, Amreen. She’s pretty amazing. Like, whoa.
Wow – your tribute made me cry too! Though I don’t catch her every day – it’s been a mainstay in my life since university. I watched it with my mom drinking tea at 4pm, i watched it when i was away at school, and i watched it on my maternity leaves – it’s been a constant source of joy and enlightenment – what a gift she’s given the world!
I know what you mean, Heather. There were lots of shows I couldn’t be bothered with… makeovers ad whatnot (but I guess ratings are ratings, right?) but most of this last year’s shows have been pretty note-worthy. I’ll be the Kleenex people are making a mint today.
I was a huge Oprah fan, then I wasn’t. I honestly thought I was over her and then in the last few days I’ve found myself checking in on her via her website and realized that the episodes I’ve loved far outweigh the ones I didn’t. I haven’t watched a full episode for years but I’ll be tuning in today with my box of Kleenex in hand.
I was never much of a daytime watcher, but when I did on occasion catch Oprah, I was always struck by how regular she could be. I remember one time she was mentioning how you reuse ziplock bags, I think, and thought holy crap, Oprah does that?! I mean, she has a cook and could just buy the ziplock company, anyhow, but no. I think it’s been a big part of why people love her so much, that for all she has, she never seems to be above anyone else or forget she’s just people.