Yesterday was the kids’ first day at school. The Boy started Grade One and the Girl is in Senior Kindergarten. They’re both in French Immersion at the same school and will come home on the same bus.
The day unfolded in a completely different manner than what I expected (Isn’t that often the case with kids?!?). The Boy started in good spirits at 9am and eagerly went off with his new teacher and class. I was more worried about the Girl, who was experiencing the big school for the first time. However, with a little cajoling, she joined her class and seemed comfortable from the get-go.
When I dropped her at noon, my son was coming in from recess with his class. Our eyes met across the corridor, and I saw his little face contort with sadness. Within moments, he ran away from his group and grabbed my legs. In tears, he said:
“I don’t have any friends here. I don’t know anyone. The only boy I know in class (from summer soccer) is being mean to me. I don’t have any one to sit with, and I’m so sad. I just want to come home. Please, please can I??”
My heart broke, but as I knew I should, I walked him back to his classroom. The teacher seemed warm and sympathetic. I went back to my car and cried. After a cosy summer together of late breakfasts and leisurely strolls, this was the harsh new reality: my kids would be gone from me the whole day, our respective lives taking new paths.
Yesterday was tough. Getting used to early morning madness and being alone. The Boy came home happy and seemed eager enough to go back today. The Girl displayed her usual resilience and bounded out the door with smiles. The Baby is lonely, missing her brother and sister. All of a sudden I notice her more, and she’s amazing. Chatting and toddling around, giving her baby doll a bottle. Is it possible that her little voice is often drowned out by the louder cries of her siblings? This is her time with me, and I’m going to enjoy it. The house is quiet though. I guess it’s going to take a few days for all of us to adjust.
Thanks for reading my blog, and sharing your thoughtful comments! It is reassuring and comforting to know that we are all going through this journey of motherhood together.
Okay, I’m crying now. Lovely writing and sentiments.
your biggest fan,
Danyael
Amreen Apa this was a beautiful note. I totally related to it especially the part about noticing the baby more 🙂
I love to read your posts, Amreen. They are always so thought-provoking and heartfelt. Keep up the good work! PS- I hope the kids’ day went well today!
I loved reading this:)
Thanks for the compassionate words. Today is day 3 and it seems like it’s getting better. No tears, but no enthusiasm either. Day by day!
Y’s first reaction was to go in and beat up the kid who mean to Boy…Until I explained that we are adults in our 30s and would probably be incarcerated if we did so. (Y is still muttering: “I’d like to wring his neck” Um, it’s probably good that we live quite far from Boy and Girl’s school…)
I’m so relieved to hear that they bounce back so quickly and that they are happy to be at school now. And I think you are right, this is the baby’s time — she’s a little doll and probably doesn’t get as much of the limelight as the other two huge personalities. Give them lots of love from us! And keep up the great work — I hope I can be as strong when I have kids and face these tough moments.
Oh, Amreen. That is heart-wrenching. It is so hard when all you want to do is bundle them in your arms and take them away from the tough stuff but you know you can’t. I hope things were better today!
Reading your post evoked so much similar emotion from me. With my eldest hitting grade two and the middle child into JK, they had reactions to the first day that ranged from total fright to absolute independence.
I, too, left the school and cried yesterday. Isn’t it funny how difficult it can be to do such seemingly simple and yet totally important things for our children?
Really glad to hear both of them were happy to go back today. It will take a while to adjust to the routines again!
Enjoy your quiet time with the baby. Those will be special moments.
Amreen, what a lovely post. I’m so glad your little man is adjusting after all…it’s heartbreaking when our kids are sad but we know we have to bundle them back into the classroom. I remember, as a kid, thinking my Mom was so heartless to send me off to school when I didn’t want to go; now I know how hard it would have been for her, too.
My kids have their moments, but overall their school is wonderful and they grow so much by being there. And, you get to spend some alone time with your baby…soon enough she’ll be heading off to school herself and then you’ll really have a quiet house!